Sometimes those around you forget about tact and ask questions that baffle you with their unceremoniousness. There is no desire to answer them frankly, and there is no need to, because there are many ways to avoid answering and avoid an awkward situation, while remaining within the bounds of decency.

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Diplomatic responses

Sometimes inappropriate questions come from complete strangers, with whom, nevertheless, there is no need to spoil relations. And even more so, you shouldn’t satisfy their curiosity. Politely enough, but firmly, let them know that you do not intend to develop a discussion of the topic raised. Here's how you can answer:

• I wouldn't like to talk about it.
• Sorry, but this is personal.
• Doesn't matter. Oh, well, what's the difference.
• It's a long story.
• Complex issue. I can’t answer it right off the bat.
• Why are we all about me! Let's talk about you better.
• Sorry, I can't tell you that. I hope you understand.

By the way, the phrase “I hope you understand” works wonders. It makes your opponent realize that you consider him a polite and tactful person who knows why you cannot carry on a conversation on the topic he has raised.

Your words will sound more kind if you say them with.

Answers for those especially curious

What is tactlessness for some may be healthy curiosity for others, in which there is nothing shameful. Such people don’t even realize that their questions have offended you in some way. They expect a sincere answer and will likely repeat their question if you try to hush up the conversation. You won't achieve anything with hints either.

For example, if you respond to an inappropriate question with a meaningful counter-question, “Why are you asking?”, be prepared for the fact that this will not work and the person will not understand that he asked too much. It may also turn out that you will receive an answer to this that is stunning in its simplicity: “I’m just interested.” After which they will continue to wait for an answer from you. In this case, you will have to directly say that you do not want to discuss this topic.

The dialogue may not end there, because your interlocutor will quite sincerely ask why you don’t want to talk about it. And if you have the time and patience, it would be a good idea to actually explain why you think the subject of the conversation is inappropriate. You will have to answer simply and directly:

• Because we discuss this issue only with our family and with no one else.
• Because this topic is unpleasant to me.
• Because this is personal and concerns only me.
• Because I promised not to talk about it.
• Because I don't like sharing these things.
• Because I don't want to.

It is very important to say this in a calm tone, without a challenge in your voice. Let your interlocutor understand that you are not hostile, but that you will not allow your boundaries to be violated.

It is more difficult if your interlocutor is not just curious, but deliberately seeks to put you in an awkward position. In this case, there is nothing else left but to say directly that you will not answer this question and this topic is not discussed.

Answers with humor

The first reaction to a tactless question is shock and indignation. However, the person who asked it may not have done it to offend you or provoke a quarrel, but simply without thinking. Most often, this is the sin of friends and relatives, who are sure that we will always understand them correctly and will not be offended. To avoid such situations, try laughing it off:

• What is this, an interrogation? I demand a lawyer!
• How much do I get? Isn’t it only food that is given for work?
• It's a secret. Can you keep secrets? I can do it too.
• Of course, I can tell you, but after that I will have to kill you.
• When will you get married? I probably won’t have time today. Maybe tomorrow.

This will throw the ball into your interlocutor’s half of the field. Let him now think about how to react to your joke.

Have you asked? We answer!

How much do you earn?

• Enough for life.
• Thank you, I'm not complaining.
• Of course, I would like more, but who wouldn’t want it, right?

When will you get married/have kids?

• Everything has its time.
• When we are ready to take on such responsibility.
• As soon as possible.

Why were you fired?

• Long story. Better tell me how you are doing.
• Oh, everything is so complicated there, I don’t want to burden you with details.
• Because everything comes to an end and it’s time to move on.

Are you dating anyone?

• Every day! Today, for example, we met with you.
• I don't complain about loneliness.
• I'll tell you sometime later.

In addition to evasive answers, jokes and polite ones, there is another option - not to say anything. You can simply smile silently and let the question hang in the air. Most likely, your opponent will feel awkward and will want to change the subject.

Because the vast majority of the components of Muhammad's ideology are not religious. These components include about 83% of Islamic texts. And only about 17% concern Islamic religious practices and theology.

The religious part of Islam is what Mohammedans must do to get to Jannah (Mohammedan paradise) with the Houris.

Most of the trilogy (Koran + Sunnah + Sirah) is not about what a Mohammedan should be. On the contrary, it is about non-Mohammedans. In the Koran, “kafirs” (non-Muslims) refer to 64% of all words, and the entire trilogy devotes 60% of the text to them.

In particular, what Muhammad and his sahaba did with the “kafirs” - robbed, raped, killed - is not religion, but 100% politics and ideology. The political part is concerned with “kafirs”, and not with rituals and ceremonies (which non-Mohammedans really don’t care about).

Non-Mohammedans do not care how Mohammedans worship their Allah, with which foot they go to the toilet and how many houris they dream of, but they are all concerned with how Mohammedans act towards non-Mohammedans and what the fundamental Islamic texts say about non-Muslims.

Let me give just a few examples:

“Verily, those of the possessors of the book and the polytheists who disbelieved are in the fire of Gehenna, remaining there forever. They - the worst from the creature." - Quran 98:6

Verse 9:29 serves as the basis for the well-known discrimination of Christians, Jews, Sabeans, Zoroastrians in the territories occupied by Islamic conquerors

“Fight those of the People of the Book who do not believe in Allah or the Last Day, who do not consider forbidden what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden, who do not profess the true religion, until they begin to pay tribute with their own hands in a humiliating manner.» - Quran 9:29

• here you need to add the famous verse of the sword - Quran 9:5

Some verses regarding famous Islamic doctrine al-wala wal-bara (friendship and non-involvement) :

“O you who believe! Do not consider Jews and Christians your helpers and friends because they help each other. If any of you considers them your helpers and friends, then he himself is one of them.” - Quran 5:51

“Believers (Mohammedans - approx.) should not take infidels as friends instead of believers. And whoever does this has nothing to do with Allah, except in cases where you fear them.” - Quran 3:28

According to the Quran, showing friendliness towards non-Muslims is a sign of hypocrisy:

“Give good news of painful suffering hypocrites who take unbelievers as their assistants and friends instead of believers" - Quran 4:138-139

Xenophobic attitudes towards Jews, polytheists and non-Mohammedans in general:

"You you will certainly find the Jews and polytheists your most fierce enemies believers (Mohammedans)" - Quran 5:82

« many of them (non-Muslims) are wicked." - Quran 5:81

You can also add here:
- numerous verses of the Koran and hadiths about jihad
- numerous xenophobic and misogynistic attitudes in the Sunnah
- orders of murder for former Mohammedans

I don’t know who you are, but you are clearly far from Islam and are deliberately misleading people. Islam is a religion of peace, kindness and understanding of each other. All the verses of the Quran (and they were revealed over 23 years) must be understood in the context of the time when they were revealed and in the light of the events that took place at that time around Islam and the Prophet Mohammed (s.w.a.), also in parallel with the hadiths . Please, if you don’t know anything about religion, don’t sow confusion among society. The fact that you have picked up certain “tops” without a deep understanding of not only Islam and religion as such in general, you can clearly purposefully lead your thoughts in one direction, this is obvious. Remember, society needs to be united and not split, and we will all be responsible for what we say, if not in this life, then in the next life for sure. Good luck and all the best to you.

Answer

Comment

A few techniques that will help you answer the most tricky questions and still feel great.

« And how much do you earn?», « Don't you want to give birth to a second one?», « When will you get married?», « You're getting a divorce, right?“—probably, each of us has found ourselves in an awkward situation when a curious interlocutor really wanted to get information that you do not want to share, and then regret the direction this conversation took.

We present to your attention several strategies that will help you answer the most tricky questions and feel great at the same time. If you follow our advice, you won’t have to fumble for words in a real situation.

When answering unpleasant questions, you have every right not to give the interlocutor any specific information. Behave like the programmer from the joke, who answered the question of the lost Holmes and Watson traveling in a hot air balloon absolutely correctly, but at the same time his words were of no use.

– Sir, can you tell us where we are?
- In the basket hot air balloon, sir!

Or give general, but also not very useful information.

– How much do you earn?
– Like everyone else, the average salary in the industry(significantly less than Abramovich).

2. “Mirroring”

“Return” the interlocutor his question. This can be done using two simple techniques.

1) Formulate the “request” in such a way that the person you are talking to feels uncomfortable about their interest. Use a universal construction that begins with the words " I understand correctly that...“, and its end will depend solely on whether you continue communication, whether you want to “build” your personal boundaries, etc.: “ Do I understand correctly that you wouldn't mind holding a candle in my bedroom?", or " Do I understand correctly that your main problem today is my personal life?", or " Do I understand correctly that interest in other people’s troubles is in the order of things for you?" It’s great if you say all this in a very polite, very calm, icy tone and don’t make any gestures, except maybe raise one eyebrow in surprise.

2) “Strengthen” interest in a given topic by addressing your interlocutor with a counter question from the same category:

– When are you going to give birth to your second?
– Are you the third?

3. “One-man show”

Having heard some unpleasant question, you can always imagine yourself as a great dramatic actress, look soulfully into the eyes of your interlocutor, take a deep breath, press your hands to your chest (if you wish, you can “break” your fingers), portray an abyss of despair and say in a tragic voice: “ I beg you! Never, you hear me, never ask me about this!».

The second option is that you portray a person giving a press conference (we will not name specific names, but we recommend paying attention to the persons in the first echelon of power) and say the phrase: “ Next question please!" The third version is for fans of the series “Univer”. Remember the karateka Eduard Kuzmin (aka Kuzya) and say: “ This is classified information!».

4. “I’m not a bore, I’m not a bore, I’m not a bore!”

Instead of being offended, angry, or otherwise demonstrating that your interlocutor’s question has offended you, start answering in an even, monotonous voice. The most important thing is the details. Give the smallest details and start very far away!

– When will you get married?
– Astrologers say that for the conclusion happy marriage it is necessary for the ascendants of lovers to converge(don’t ask us what ascendants are and whether they should actually converge - any abstruse theory that your counterpart is not very versed in will do, even a “star chart”, even a sharp turn in the life line, even the Nazdak index). And that’s the moment when I realize that I’ve met my soulmate and check if we’re right for each other(you will have to clarify where and what time he was born), then I will tell him: “Yes.” And not a minute sooner.

5. Just kidding, it's annoying!

–My God, how much did you spend on this dress?
– I had to starve for two weeks, but what can’t you do for fashion!

Universal answers:

“I admire your ability to ask questions that baffle!” Or: " You - amazing woman(amazing man), do you know what has always amazed me about you? This is your ability to ask incorrect (complex, rhetorical) questions!”

“I’ll be happy to answer your question, just tell me first why you’re so interested in this?”

“For what purposes are you interested?”

“Do you really want to talk about this?”. If you hear an affirmative "Yes", boldly retort: ​​“ But I do not want", - and smile.

If you don't want to have anything to do with a person who asks insensitive questions, you can afford a little more. For example, note in response: “ It's my damn business.".