Women are often perplexed: why does a man delay with a legitimate proposal? What is he afraid of? (taking it “weakly” is a well-known female tactic). He loves her, they have been together for a long time - what the hell else does he need? I think it will be difficult for men to answer this question: unlike women’s, men’s brains are not so deftly oriented in interpersonal relationships and all sorts of twists of the human soul. They slow down a little, since everything has to go through a man’s consciousness, put into clear, convincing formulations. Well, I will help my brothers.

A woman determines whether this man is right for her within the first few minutes of meeting her. Theoretically, after these minutes, it can already be taken to the registry office. A man delays and delays with a proposal because most often he does not have the psychological and intellectual resources to immediately and clearly understand why this lady is ready to be with him. Men actually have intuition, but most often it is suppressed by rationality. Now his chosen one seems to love him. But what happens then, after the birth of the child? Will the mere sight of him make her sick, as young mothers write on forums? Will it happen that she will immediately - and forever - switch to the child? Will they definitely remain one team with the same leader? Or will no one be interested in him now? With all his problems, with his whole life?

The brain of a normal man processes all this very slowly. No special training. The majority do not even have the necessary categorical apparatus. From childhood, men accustomed to responsibility - I mean normal, not mama's boys, and also not teenagers suffering from sperm toxicosis (some remain both until old age) - have firmly learned one thing: you give your word - keep it. Otherwise, you risk losing your self-respect. We don’t have the classic female excuse “I promised because I was in such and such a mood, it’s not my fault that it’s different now.” It is too serious for us to be responsible for those we have tamed. You can't go wrong from the start.

We don’t have the classic female excuse “I promised because I was in such and such a mood, it’s not my fault that it’s different now.”

I’ll say it sincerely: we don’t need this male freedom for nothing. At least for those who have already turned 30. But how not to get into trouble? How can we find out more precisely whether this woman really needs him - his appearance, his calling, his unique soul? Or maybe she is contacting him just because “he suits her” - like some average husband? Like, he earns decent money, drinks little, loves animals, and the living conditions are quite good... How does a wife constantly push her husband around, calling him disparagingly “mine”? How do aunts spoil the bones of their husbands on forums, savoring (most often minor and quite forgivable) their shortcomings? It is not enough for a man to simply “suit” someone. He wants to be unique, unique, and - which is no less important for him - respected. Respect is not a woman’s instinct “in the first minutes of acquaintance.” It will take some time to decide on it. Most often, it is this situation that men do not know how to sort out.

A man endures marriage out of love for a woman.” A woman gets married because she wants to. But a mature man no longer lives by desires alone. He thinks, evaluates the current situation and possibilities, and strives to comprehend the future. But comprehension is not done quickly.

And the fact that “women are often perplexed” is most revealing. It would seem that all such advanced psychologists are so well versed in relationships, they can talk about them for hours, procrastinate on every aspect of them... And when it comes to the most important thing in which we live, they suddenly find themselves at a loss. Is this a coincidence?

And I’ll tell you what: women do not understand the inner world of men. All these categories, concepts that we have been building in our lives for years, even decades (views, value system, self-respect, vocation, sense of responsibility, the demand for our abilities by society, duty to loved ones, friends and the Fatherland) - they are not tender for women. Because they live completely differently. I looked into the eyes, smelled the smell, heard the timbre of the voice, and the decision was ready, “suitable or not suitable”...

Subconsciously, men feel that often, even too often, their chosen ones just allow themselves to be loved. This is the nature of things. And if we are to part with freedom, then it will be out of mutual love. That will be fair. This is how male slowness is deciphered.

And we have never been cowards. They always knew how, and even loved to take risks. Unlike.

The appearance of a child in a family is definitely a transition of the family to a new level. This is not comparable to planning a vacation or choosing a car. And many women in such a situation, in order to feel more confident and calm, would like to formalize their relationship.

From a psychological point of view, it is not so important whether the spouses have a stamp in their passport if both partners are satisfied with their situation and feel comfortable in a civil marriage. The main thing is that the family is harmonious. For a child in a civil marriage, the main thing is loving parents and peace in the family, even during his intrauterine development. If both in a couple really do not want “officialdom,” then it is better to leave everything as it is. True, before the birth of a child in a civil marriage, it is better to discuss with your husband legal issues: child’s last name, where to register him, etc.

However, if a woman suddenly understands: I want to get married, but the man doesn’t want to get married, the couple faces a difficult choice.

Why do women want to get married?

First of all, you need to understand why a woman wants to get married. There may be several reasons:

1. Dream of a beautiful holiday. For many girls, a wedding is proof of a man's love. Let the celebration be modest, but with a white dress, surrounded by loved ones and friends. And then, it’s nice to feel like a beautiful bride in the spotlight.
2. Family education. Most women from childhood absorb the idea that children should be born in an official marriage. And even if they live in a civil union, they still expect to register their marriage in the future, especially if pregnancy has already occurred.
3. Rights of a child in a civil marriage. Many women believe that the rights of a child in a civil marriage are violated.
4. Status. After marriage, many girls develop inner pride from the realization of the fact: I’m married! And this gives the woman “weight” in her husband’s family. For example, in the case conflict situation with his relatives, no one will dare to say to her: “Who are you here?” If the marriage is formalized, then she will answer: “I am his wife.” And this is an argument! And phrases like “I am his common-law wife” will generate answers: “We know such wives, today one, tomorrow another.”
5. Convenience in the social sphere. If a woman has a child in a civil marriage, she often experiences discomfort when communicating with the administration in kindergartens, schools, authorities social protection and other official authorities. In such cases, they constantly require some additional certificates and confirmations, the collection of which takes time and effort. A stamp in your passport eliminates such bureaucratic red tape.

A woman should remember or write down those arguments regarding official marriage that are important to her. They will be useful to her when talking with her husband.

Why don't men want to get married?

So why don't men want to get married? It must be said that there are men who actively resist registering a marriage for objective reasons. As a rule, this is associated with psychological trauma.

First reason– failed marriage of parents (divorce or “life in scandals”). A child who experienced a similar situation in childhood may decide for himself: it is better not to get married than to exist like his parents. And he delays the moment of the wedding as long as possible, driven by the thought that after this discord will begin in his personal life, i.e. he believes that this is how he “saves” his relationship!

The second reason- unsuccessful own official marriage, ending in divorce.

Third reason– lack of self-confidence, in one’s ability to provide for a family (or remain interesting to one’s already legal wife, become good father, fear of change).

Reason four- alas, he is not sure of his choice.

What to do if a man doesn't want to get married?

Here a lot depends on the woman herself, on her wisdom and tact. First of all, you need to know your man, find out the true motives for his reluctance to go to the registry office. And this is not an easy task, since men often do not understand this themselves. But if the couple has a trusting relationship, there is a chance to find the necessary information from the stories of your other half about family, friends, dreams and plans. Perhaps he will agree to go to family psychologist together to understand the reasons for his wife’s dissatisfaction and his commitment to the idea of ​​civil marriage. The main thing here is to be patient and attentive to your partner and his feelings. There is no need to interrogate. When the reasons why a man holds on to his “freedom” become clear, then one can imagine how to behave in order to improve the situation in the family.

It is not that rare that pregnancy occurs before the couple reaches the registry office. In this case, a woman often hopes that expecting a baby will push her partner to take a decisive step. But if this does not happen, and she really wants to receive a marriage proposal, then she should properly prepare for the conversation.

How to come to an agreement if you are pregnant

First you need to calm down and tune in to a calm wave. Say to yourself: “I am expecting a child from a loved one, and this in itself is happiness. I don’t yet know whether he will propose to me or not, but I know for sure that I want to preserve our relationship. I love him and he is dear to me. Therefore, I will not put pressure on him and blackmail him with pregnancy.” If the future dad reacted positively to the news of the replenishment, this is already a positive factor. A good, smooth relationship with a partner, his support is what everyone needs to the expectant mother. And now - an approximate outline of the conversation.

1. Choose a time and place. A man should not be tired or immersed in any worries. You can wait for an “excuse”, for example, a report about someone’s wedding on TV, but this is not at all necessary. And do not say in advance (for example, on the phone during the day) that you would like to talk about an important topic in the evening. This will make the man wait for the conversation with tension.
2. Start a conversation. The beginning is very important. Think about what you will say, but avoid a long introduction. For example, you can start like this: “We once talked about legitimizing our relationship. I would like to return to this topic."
3. The basis is your relationship. During this conversation, the most important thing is to say that you would like to see him as your partner in life. Talk about feelings for him, about trust. There is no need to focus on future paternity, this is in in this case“weak” argument, because he can be a full-fledged father even in a situation of an unconcluded marriage. A child living in a civil marriage receives the same fatherly love as in an official one.
4. Prepare your arguments in advance. A man who does not want to get married will certainly ask what exactly changes the stamp in the passport. You will have to tell why formalizing your marriage is so important to you. This is where writing down notes about why your marriage is important to you comes in handy.
5. Don't rush! You need to end the conversation on a positive note. Give your husband time to think, emphasizing that although marriage is very important to you, you respect any decision he makes. And be prepared to wait. It's best until he brings up the topic again.

So the man with whom you live in a civil marriage will receive an impulse that will make him reconsider his views. For some couples, this charge comes from the possibility of purchasing housing together, in others it comes from job prospects that are open only to married employees, and for others, parents or friends help them make a decision. The most important thing is to choose the right “key”.

Carefully! Often women begin to get offended, insist, and start scandals on the topic “I’m pregnant, I want to get married.” And thus they not only fail to achieve their goal, but also lose their partner.

The only path a woman should not take, no matter how strong her desires, is manipulation, deception and coercion. Of course, each case is individual, but if a woman wants a happy, harmonious relationship, she will need a thoughtful attitude towards her potential legal spouse. After all, even if for some reason he categorically does not want to get married officially, this does not mean that he does not love you or will be a bad dad. This is not at all true; often in a civil marriage, a man and a woman take their relationship very seriously, and such a union is in no way inferior to a registered one. So first, understand yourself by deciding whether official marriage is really necessary for you? Perhaps this is just an established social tradition, which is given too much attention in our society, and you can be happy without the notorious stamps in your passport? And it is quite possible to solve legal problems in other ways (for example, by registering part of the jointly acquired property in your name). The main thing is that harmony, respect, trust and, of course, love for each other reign in your couple!

When should you not get married?

• When there is a situation “either we get married or we separate.” In this case, perhaps the second option is better, since misunderstandings most likely have accumulated in the relationship, and a wedding will not erase it.
• When there are many obvious conflicts in a relationship that need to be resolved. Resolve conflicts first, and then you can think about the wedding.
• When less than six months have passed since the meeting and the beginning of the relationship (or better yet, a year). There may not be enough time to get to know each other.

What do they write on

My husband and I got married a week before leaving for maternity leave. He was 40 and I was 31 when we met him. There was no special reason to get married. But six months later I became pregnant. At first they didn’t want to change anything, but closer to the birth they decided that children should be born in a legal marriage. It will be very difficult to explain to a growing child why something in his family is different from others. But this is our opinion. And then, from the point of view of the law, the rights of the child and mother are protected only in the case of legal marriage. Now in the Family Code there is no such concept as civil marriage.

As a result, there have already been cases when an accident happened to a common-law husband (he died), and the wife could not even live in the apartment, since it was registered in the name of her husband, although it was acquired during cohabitation. I don’t want to scare anyone, but we need to think about children right away.

My husband and I have been living in a civil marriage for 6 years now, and I don’t see anything unnatural in this. The main thing is that there is harmony between you. And the conversation about marriage began to arise only now, when he found out that he would be a daddy.

And if we do this, it will be only for the sake of our baby. And so, I think, everything is God’s will, but numerous relatives tortured me with questions. At first I was also shy, but then I thought - I don’t have to explain anything to anyone, and if it’s good for us, then so be it.

Why don't men want to get married? The reasons why representatives of the stronger half do not feel the desire to get married are growing and multiplying every day. If you do not try to explore the individual history of each individual person with his life experience and traumas received in relationships, but turn to the study of the history of all humanity, then there are certain differences in attitudes towards marriage between current and past generations. So, before it was very difficult to survive alone, people united into families, united by birth and lived a community-like life, which helped to survive. Now conditions have changed, and a person is quite capable of independently providing for his own existence, which removes the need for marriage as a vital need. Again, the laws of public morality have become much more flexible, and no one will reproach young man for living with a girl without a signature or considering single status as something not very attractive in a job description.

Gone are those terrible times when you had to have a family to travel abroad, when you could be summoned to a comradely trial for the transience of romances. The moral foundations of society and the material aspects of existence ceased to have any influence on the formation married couple. Even the conventional division of responsibilities based on gender is no longer relevant; men cook well and equip their home with the necessary household appliances.

So it turns out that the reasons for entering into or not entering into marriage at the moment may be mainly internal psychological characteristics, as well as feelings for a potential chosen one.

Why men don't want to get married - psychology

The psychological reasons why modern men do not want to get married can be due to both external objective reasons and internal unconscious components. The first thing that lays the foundation of family life is the example of the parental family. If a man has witnessed scandals, showdowns, fights, disrespectful attitudes since childhood, or if he lived only with his mother, who did not work through her own pain and disappointment and constantly spoke negatively about his father and all men in general, the idea is formed that marriage spoils relationships and lives of people. A man may unconsciously avoid formalizing the relationship, considering this to be the cause of all the negative experiences of his parents, and guided by a reluctance to repeat it.

The next reason why men don’t want to get married is they don’t want to remarry. It’s not difficult to guess why men don’t want to get married after a divorce, because this is your own experience, and not observation of others. Those. he already knows from the inside what awaits him after the registry office, and now he doesn’t picture anything good for him after the divorce.

If there is no trauma received directly from the marital experience, and the man is not going to legitimize the relationship, then the matter may be in his personal comfort. He was used to a certain routine, a state of affairs, freedom and perhaps the fact that friends could visit him unannounced at three in the morning. Letting a woman into your home initially means changing your own habits, restricting freedom and restructuring your life. Not everyone is ready for this, even if it’s only about the girl moving in with him and not the wedding. Living in different living spaces is emotionally more comfortable, and if the work is stressful, then there may simply not be enough energy to establish something new and allocate a woman her shelf for creams.

It is worth considering that men feel responsibility differently, and the official registration of a relationship is immediately seen by them as the need to have their own housing, the ability to independently support themselves and several other people (after all, a wife on maternity leave, looking after a child, and women are paid less). A simple ceremony with a white dress looks like a mortgage in their eyes, sleepless nights and an increase in the burden of responsibility for several more people. This is terrifying, especially if your own life has not yet completely settled down.

This reason has similarities with the belief that you first need to achieve something and stand firmly on your feet. Perhaps he decided as a child that his family would not huddle in a dorm and eat empty porridge, as was his case. How logical and objective this is is for everyone to decide separately, because many couples are quite happy living in the same hostel. It happens that this motive is true, but it also happens that they beautifully cover up the lack of feelings for a woman until she meets the right one.

The close environment involuntarily influences the attitude towards marriage simply by the existing relationships of each member of a person’s mini-world. So, if all friends are free, the likelihood of wanting to register a relationship is low and is possible with great love or the influence of family overpowering the influence of friends.

Why don't men want to get married a second time?

Why men after a divorce do not want to get married or put forward this reason as a weighty one, but which is only a cover for their unwillingness to commit their lives to obligations, depends on the reasons and course of the divorce, as well as the emotional fallout after it. If a man, citing an unsuccessful relationship, constantly criticizes his current woman, pointing out to her that she is repeating the mistakes of his last wife, then most likely the reason for not wanting to repeat a negative experience is made up, and the man does not find the courage to voice sincere reasons. Even if you believe it, it turns out that it was he who chose a woman similar to his past wife, but at the same time he does not want a repetition. This is a sophisticated kind of masochism.

If, indeed, the last marriage was unsuccessful and caused wounds to the man’s heart, then he may be afraid to build again serious relationship. After betrayal, it’s hard to start trusting, after constant reproaches - to start acting and offering, after humiliation - to believe in your need and beauty. The wound must heal, feelings, even negative ones, must subside, otherwise past relationships will be a dark shadow in your family. And here it is worth paying tribute and thanking the man who is in no hurry to sign until the past is finally over.

Men are more attached in relationships than women, therefore, having already experienced the collapse of a relationship once, it takes a lot of courage and restored internal resources to be able to try again. Now without rose-colored glasses and with full awareness, confirmed by heart “scars”, that this relationship may not last forever, that the negative experience that already happened once can be repeated there. While there are no such resources or the woman nearby is not patient and sensitive enough, the man will be on the defensive and act, guided by the restrictive but preserving principle that if no one is close, then no one will hurt.

Why don't men want to marry a woman with a child?

Not every man’s refusal to marry is motivated by the woman’s presence of children; if you look deeper into the situation, various details can become clear that radically change the perception of human behavior. If the man initially knew about the child and did not stop trying to get closer, then it is possible that the proposal life together will come a little later than the woman expects. It’s a different story if people are in the dating stage, and such news is always a surprise, shock and confusion - it doesn’t matter whether the woman told the news as early or late as possible, tried to choose the words and the moment, doing everything delicately, or dropped the information suddenly.

If a woman delays with such news, then the man’s refusal not only to get married, but in general from a relationship can be fully explained by his bewilderment and anger for hiding such important information. It is likely that he made plans for a joint future, his desires and joint dreams became more serious, but all this became irrelevant. Not because the man is an ardent opponent of children or hates this particular one, no. It’s just that now everything that he dreamed, planned and cherished will have to be changed or canceled - this is mental strength and disappointment. Trust immediately drops to zero, because if she hid her own child for a long time, she wonders what other surprises might come to light, and how she is going to build a family, what motivated her behavior. From this moment on, the most favorable development of a joint future may be starting a relationship from scratch, introducing the inclusion of a child. If a woman (due to her reluctance to lose her loved one, following other people’s advice, etc.) did not immediately imagine her maternal role, but the man remained, this indicates the seriousness and depth of his feelings for this woman. Perhaps he will get married later, as soon as he recovers from the shock.

If a woman immediately informs a man that she has a child, usually the man disappears immediately. The feelings have not yet had time to get stronger, there is no strong connection and there is no serious experience of the breakup. When a man decides to continue communication, then you should not compare the course of this relationship with those that existed before the presence of children. There, two free people could get married in a week, go on a trip, abandon everything, and surrender to emotions. Now there is a greater understanding of responsibility, attention goes not to how she dances and how he plays maracas, but to whether one can rely on a person, how he acts with others, how he lives. Now it’s not enough to run to the registry office; now the man needs to make friends with her child. The process of gaining trust in a fatherless child can be long and difficult. A person who respects himself and his companion will not marry before establishing a good connection with the child of the woman he loves. Just as a young girl’s marriage is blessed by her parents, so a mother’s marriage to a man should be blessed by her children.

But the reason for a man’s reluctance to marry may be related to the character of the woman herself, who during her independent life has learned to solve many problems, has become tougher and more calculating, relies on herself and does not trust the world. Of course, these qualities helped her survive, but the man wants to be a breadwinner, wants his opinion to be listened to and his help needed. When he is given orders from the section “buy milk while I finish this shelf,” a man becomes emotionally in a child’s position and experiences filial feelings for a woman, and they do not marry mothers.

Therefore, before deciding to explain everything in a simplified version, where the lack of desire to get married is due to the child, a woman should think about her influence on this attitude. Some will be helped by their friends to look at everything from the outside, some will be advised by the man himself, some will go deeper into the forums or go for a consultation with a psychologist. In order to be together, efforts must be made by both, and not hidden behind the child.

Still from the movie "Sex and the City"

Before getting married, a man must get a job, an apartment, a car and experience in solving life's problems. Otherwise, no one is interested in him except the ladies who post their photos in groups like “hot giving mothers, I’ll choose by repost.” But there are rumors that more than 50% of the ladies there are controlled by bots. No one expects the same approach from a woman. Have you ever seen a man who would first ask if a lady had a car? Me not.

A man should be able to solve any problem - at a minimum, providing for his family at a decent level during pregnancy, and at maximum, providing for his wife for the rest of her life. At least, this is what the women waving the “I want to get married” sign expect from him. How many women do you know who firmly know that they will be able to provide for their family in the event of their husband’s temporary or permanent disability? Show me these beautiful women, I want to add their names to the red book.

The most interesting thing is that in modern world The role of captain of a ship is not recognized at all for a man. Or rather, how to say... When you accidentally step in shit, a man must urgently fly in on a blue helicopter, solve all your problems and evaporate in the fog. Change the wheel, crane or place of residence. Give money for a new dress for a corporate party and a little more for a beauty salon. This is his responsibility.

But when you return drunk from a corporate party, flirt with a young taxi driver or flirt with a neighbor, your husband’s voice immediately turns into an advisory one - you are an adult woman and don’t owe him anything. You'll come home tomorrow. What kind of rights?

When it comes to children, the husband also exists not as a separate parent, but rather as a food supply. He, of course, can make decisions, but only with your approval and the ones you want. The responsibility to provide for him is recognized indisputably, and the right to educate is recognized in some places. Any court thinks in the category of the father as a second-class parent. And the mother is a priori endowed with all rights, even the right to prohibit the child from communicating with the father.

At the word wedding, a woman imagines in her dreams White dress and a cake with figures, and a man - mortgages, loans, and double problems. In the modern world, a wife is a guaranteed problem doubler. A man is just learning to solve his own problems, but they immediately try to pin ten new ones on him. And it would be nice if these were problems like “going to the pharmacy for medicine when she got sick.” Or “to develop a common cause together.” No. These are problems like “where is my new dress”?!

The wife comes not alone, but with her hemorrhoids, which should be inherited by the man from his mother or father. If otherwise, then why do I need a permanent man at all,” the woman exclaims indignantly. Let him come on weekends with flowers and martinis. And the man agrees. Because although flowers and martinis are hemorrhoids, they are less than simply putting an infantile, demanding, disobedient 60-80 kg girl with an unpaid mortgage on your neck.

Equal and equal union of two loving hearts has long been recognized as the lot of suckers. But this is a real marriage. At least I believe...

Mutual love, common interests, complete harmony and everything seems to be good, but there is one “but” in the relationship - the guy does not want to get married. Modern morals are such that a situation where a young man does not propose marriage, but a couple meets or even lives together, is absolutely normal. However, almost all girls I want to create a full-fledged family and give birth to a child. Let's figure out why a man postpones the wedding, how to understand his intentions, and what a woman should do.

Men are very creative and can use various excuses to avoid getting married. Sometimes a hint of a wedding from a girl is perceived by them as an encroachment on precious freedom. Nevertheless, men still get married. Why are they doing that?

Why do men get married and why do women want to get married?

To understand why a man doesn’t want to get married, let’s answer the question why the stronger sex gets married at all. Of course, everyone has their own motivating factor. However, the most common causes can be deduced.

Most men marry reluctantly, but still agree to marriage

So why do men get married? Psychology says that the main reasons for getting married are:

1. Sex. Having a permanent partner is a common reason for men to get married.
2. Self-affirmation. The desire to assert oneself in the role of a leader is often motivating. However, a surprise awaits many men after the registry office - not all women meekly occupy a subordinate position.
3. Life. Household chores depress a man, so he finds an assistant who will do this for him.
4. Fear of loneliness. Marriage promises a man that there will always be someone to take care of him. He is afraid of losing the woman he loves, so he “claims his rights to her.”
5. “Because it’s necessary”. In this case, the man follows the lead of society. Marriages by chance can be included in this category.
6. By calculation. For some reason, a stereotype has developed that creating a family of convenience is more typical for women. Nevertheless, men are not averse to receiving money, social status, promotion, etc. as a dowry.

The situation when a man loves but does not want to get married is also quite common. In such cases, a family is created because the woman wanted it that way. Living in a so-called civil marriage, young man it doesn't matter what it's called. He will go to the registry office only if the girl insists on it.

Why a man doesn't want to get married

Of course, it also happens that a man wants a child, a family and cannot imagine life without his chosen one. Love marriages, fortunately, also happen.

Why do girls want to get married? Psychology speaks about the following reasons:

1. Love for a man and the desire to live with him all my life.
2. The desire to obtain the status of a wife.
3. Pressure from society.
4. The desire to have a child.
5. Good relations with the relatives of the future husband, counting on their help.
6. Receiving support and help in solving problems, the desire to have an ally.
7. The desire for financial well-being.
8. The desire to prove to the ex that “they have lost a lot.”

In the end a girl can just want home comfort, family holidays and traditions. But, alas, stories in the spirit of “we’ve been living together for 2 years, but he doesn’t want to get married” or “we’ve been dating for 2 years, he doesn’t want to get married, we don’t live together” are quite common. What signs indicate that a man is not planning to go to the registry office and why did he decide so? Let's try to figure it out.

Why do girls want to get married?

Why doesn't a man want to get married?

Modern reasons for abandoning marriage are very diverse. The first thing girls need to remember is that it doesn’t mean that a man doesn’t love you if he doesn’t ask you to marry you. Many guys are afraid that after a stamp appears in their passport relationships will change fundamentally, but this is not the only reason.

Cohabitation has become widespread, so marriage has become unnecessary for men

Now many people live together without getting married. The psychology of a man is such that he believes that going to the registry office is not at all necessary - after all, he already has everything, what gives family life. Women are fundamentally not happy with this situation.

Reasons for a man's refusal to marry

There are several reasons for this state of affairs. Here are the most common:

1. Financial insolvency. Starting a family entails the responsibility to provide for it, and a bachelor is not always ready for this.
2. Love for freedom. “Marriage is voluntary slavery,” men believe and are in no hurry to put on shackles.
3. Parental disagreement. Parental prohibitions often conceal banal dislike for a potential daughter-in-law and suspicions of her prudence.
4. Fear. Starting a family entails responsibility for your wife and children. This prospect is frightening.
5. Negative experience. The man fears that the unfavorable experience of previous relationships will repeat again, so he is in no hurry to enter into a second marriage.
6. Greed. Common reason wealthy men.

Young people believe that a stamp in a passport limits their freedom. While they live in a civil marriage, psychologically there is feeling of "escape routes". Even if he doesn't plan to use them, having the choice to "leave or stay" is reassuring.

Cohabitation does not oblige you to anything - the man can leave

Let’s also not exclude a not entirely pleasant reason - he disappointed in the chosen one. While he was in love, the guy was interested, but over time he realized that this girl would never become his wife. Only he doesn’t have the courage to tell her about it.

Or perhaps everything is much simpler. It may well be that he is a naturally shy person and is afraid to propose for fear of being rejected.

A woman often does not understand what lies behind her chosen one’s reluctance to marry. She thinks something like this: “We’ve been dating for a year. We recently started living together. Love each other. What else does he need?

The woman does not understand why the man does not marry

How to make a man marry you?

You can lead almost any guy to marriage, if, of course, he has any feelings for the girl. First of all, no need to rush. Usually a man does not ask for marriage, because he needs to get used to this idea, because marriage is not an easy matter.

You have to be wise, prudent and not rush things

Quite often, a woman remains lonely because of incorrect behavior that repels a man. You won't be able to push a guy to get married if you:

• are overly demanding of their partner;
• picky;
• actively argue, obsessively trying to convince your opponent that your point of view is the only correct one;
• humiliate a man;
• You are not acting feminine.

What to do if you recognize yourself in this description? Urgently reconsider the line of conduct and character.

How to behave so that a man wants to get married? First of all need to calm down. It will not be possible to persuade a guy with hysterics, tears and screams.

Is it possible to remind yourself of marriage? You can give hints, but you shouldn’t constantly ask when he’s going to propose, just like he will and pester you with talk about the wedding. A man must accept this himself responsible and important decision. It will not be possible to persuade him by deception or other means.

There is no need to create scandals to push for a wedding

Remember that there is no universal phrase that any man can use. Each story is individual, and only you know how to bring the relationship to the wedding with your chosen one.

1. Create for a man comfortable conditions. Show concern for him, empathize and rejoice with him, share his interests.
2. Don't play the role of wife until you are. Even if you live together, keep your distance. For example, do not wash his things, do not do the cleaning without his participation, cook less often, etc. If a man receives everything from a woman before marriage, he does not have to marry.
3. Don't settle for cohabitation. If you want to test whether you can live together, then set a deadline for the marriage demo to end.
4. “Warm up” his excitement. Be late for dates, reschedule meetings, be mysterious and different. The main thing here is not to overdo it.
5. Meet his loved ones. Find an approach to everyone and create a favorable impression of yourself. Never speak ill of his acquaintances.
6. Stay interesting. Don't focus on relationships. Continue your education, build a career, develop.

A man wants to see not only a lover, but also a girlfriend, a loyal ally, and a partner nearby. It is important for him to feel a reliable shoulder nearby.

Become a man's friend

Don't put pressure on a man or try to force him. Be patient and take our advice into account.

Understanding the reason why a man is in no hurry to get married is sometimes difficult. Perhaps over time he will decide to take this serious step.