This is not a nursing home, but ordinary social housing for poor pensioners. Apartments here are not sold, but rented. And everyone pays differently.

While traveling around the USA, I visited such a house. I show you how it works.

1 Social housing is not usually located in good areas, but retirement housing is a good exception. It’s not him, of course, but an expensive golf club opposite.

2 When I arrived, renovations were in full swing in the yard. In the house itself too. renters have to move into temporary apartments while their walls are painted and plumbing replaced. The residents are indignant, complaining that old people are being poisoned with paint, but I believe that everything will be fine.

3 Parking for residents. There are strict rules here: if you come to visit, get a pass with the apartment number and the owner’s name. Otherwise, the car will be quickly taken away by a tow truck, and you will have to pay a fine.

4 The whole house belongs to one company. They rent out apartments, maintain the house, carry out repairs, etc.

5 Smoking is strictly prohibited in the building and on the grounds. This is being monitored. But there is a special place for smoking in the yard.

6 This courtyard was built by the residents themselves. As I was told, all this is the work of emigrants from Russia.

7 The neighbors already have a playground. Children cannot live in a nursing home.

It is possible to bring your grandchildren here for a couple of days to visit, but they do not have the right to reside permanently.

9 Grandmothers all over the world are alike. Russian, American and Chinese pensioners plant mini-vegetable gardens near their homes.

10 A wild hare was discovered in the bushes. He lives quietly and is almost not afraid of people.

11 The house was built on the principle of a condominium, where in addition to apartments there are also public spaces.

12 Mailboxes, lounge with soft chairs. There is a public toilet so you don't have to run to the apartment.

13 The long corridors are vaguely reminiscent of a hospital, but in the United States apartment buildings are almost always designed this way. But the wooden railings along the walls - yes, to help the elderly.

14 All doors are wooden and exactly the same. The tenant cannot change anything. But no one will forbid you to decorate the door to your taste. A Jew can hang a mezuzah to guard his home. The Chinese will place a bell near the entrance.

The property is maintained by a management company. If the air conditioner needs to be repaired or a blockage in the bathroom needs to be cleared, the tenant calls an assistant. He comes at a time convenient for him, even if no one is home. But I am obliged to report my visit after the fact. Although not everyone likes this arrangement.

The garbage chute is also at the entrance. A rarity in America. It doesn't smell, which is even more rare.

15 Zhanna has been living in this house for several years. Although retired, he works and teaches Ukrainian.

16 Her apartment is typical, everyone has approximately the same housing. Two rooms, of which one is a bedroom and one is a living room. In the USA it is considered a “one-room apartment”, since there is always a living room only if the apartment is not a studio. And so, they count by bedrooms.

17 The monthly rent for an apartment in this building is about $1,000. For this city it’s not that expensive, but in general the amount is not small, especially for a pensioner.

18 Therefore, the city authorities pay extra for accommodation. According to the law, the tenant pays only a third of his salary, and if it is small, then the amount is too high.

19 Another 100 dollars a month must be paid for food; the elderly are given food packages. You can’t refuse it: you need to take it, but you don’t have to eat it if you don’t like it.

20 There is a gym, unfortunately, without a swimming pool.

21 They hold many events. All advertisements are translated into two languages, Russian and Chinese.

22 Old people can even study in clubs. Drawing, crafts, music.

23 Age is not a reason to stop taking care of yourself.

24 Music corner.

25 There is a cafeteria in the house, you can buy a ready-made lunch or snack.

26 Cleanliness is monitored.

27 They even have their own beauty salon where you can get your beauty fix before a date. You have no doubt that they are having affairs here?!

28 On the sixth floor there is an event hall.

29 There is also a laundry room here. Washing machines They are not allowed to install it in apartments, but some install it.

30 Laundry - for money.

31 Although the parking lot near the house is full of tenants’ cars, not everyone has a car. Horseless residents are transported to shops and shopping centers by minibus.

32 Here on this minibus.

There are such “senior homes” in many states and cities, and Americans themselves are not surprised by them. But it happens that people retire and move to warmer states, where they buy private houses in the village for those over 55. And life there is completely different. I’ve already written about one such “city of old people” in Arizona, and I’ll write about another.

How do you like the house? Would you like your grandparents to live like this?

Employee charitable foundation“Old age is a joy”, journalist “Miloserdie.ru”

Why don't grandparents live with their relatives?

In our experience, “children betray their parents” is a rare option. I personally have seen few situations where a grandmother lived with her daughter’s or son’s family, babysat her grandchildren, and then she was “surrendered.” Usually family ties break down much earlier than the grandmother ends up in a nursing home. For example, her children left their home village for a larger city, and her grandmother did not want to leave her home, even if she was called. As long as she managed herself, this was not a problem. When she can barely walk, she cannot bring a pack of pasta from the store and wash her clothes - she especially does not want (and cannot) move far.

The Soviet system of distribution and labor conscription played a role: children can live on the other side of the country. If a grandmother is 80 and her daughter is 60, chances are that her grandchildren, who are approaching 40, saw her a couple of times 20–30 years ago. Her children themselves are no longer very energetic and healthy, and she is a stranger to her grandchildren. So she goes to a nursing home in her native region - most often in a district or regional center, because the houses there are large, with 600 people each, and the small ones - closer to her home village - were closed during the optimization process. Although in a house for 30 people with a family atmosphere she would be much better off than in a boarding school for 600. But in general, a nursing home for her is not punishment and prison, but physical salvation: bed linen is changed, food is brought 4 times a day, let not the one that grandma loved. Then it depends on the personality type: someone will live there for another 15 years, someone will die in two months.

There are much less socialized families. Everyone can live close here, but children drink, and often drink away their grandparents’ pensions - grandfathers, however, rarely live to an old age, so we are talking mainly about grandmothers. A drunken son or grandson might hit his grandmother; she eats poorly: the money is drunk and there is no one in the family to cook. In this case, the nursing home is again a physical salvation.

At the same time, grandmothers most often do not blame their relatives; they are very happy about their calls and visits, even if the relatives come once a month to collect the rest of their pension (75% of the pension is transferred to the account of the boarding school, 25% remains for the elderly). They are glad that they can be useful. If we give grandmothers Stuffed Toys, they are happy because they will be able to give this toy to their grandson or great-grandson if they bring him to visit.

There are, of course, grandmothers for whom a nursing home is a prison; they perceive their children as traitors. Here, a very good nursing home, with attentive staff and good material resources, can be perceived as a disaster in life, especially if the grandmother is intelligent (for example, a school teacher or accountant). And a perfect shack can be perceived as a normal house (if the grandmother, for example, was a milkmaid or beet-maker and did not see much comfort in her life). And there are also classic stories when grandmother’s apartment or house was sold, their conditions were improved, the grandmother was first taken in, and then they showed her in every possible way that she was superfluous, and she herself asked to go to a boarding school or was taken straight there. But these stories are ten times fewer than those from the series “it just so happened,” “all my relatives died,” “my son drank and beat me,” or “my daughter is disabled and lives in a neighboring boarding school.”

Who decides where older people will spend their final years?

In a classic Moscow boarding school (for example, this one) there are 500 beds, of which 275 are for bedridden people and 75 for the blind. Nursing homes in Moscow are managed by the Department of Social Protection. But grandparents can end up in psychoneurological boarding schools (PNI) and even in psychiatric hospitals for years. Many graduates of orphanages, especially correctional ones, or graduates with disabilities at the age of 18 end up in a nursing home if the disability is physical. If it’s mental, then go to PNI. And they remain there until their death.

In addition, there is Order 216 of the Ministry of Health on medical contraindications, in the presence of which a person may not be allowed into a nursing home or a nursing home. Therefore, if a person has tuberculosis or epilepsy with frequent seizures, then he will have to live in the system of the Ministry of Health. Hospices are also sometimes opened even in fairly remote villages: this can be called a real hospice with a license for narcotic painkillers, but then they will most often only take oncology patients, and they will not accept neurological and other patients.

How life works in nursing homes

The situation depends decisively on the personnel. If the director cares about the grandparents, he and the entire staff will motivate, and will invite sponsors, and will call volunteers, and will give money for gasoline so that the residents of the boarding school can go on an excursion somewhere on a government bus, and will allocate a room for a house church.

There are a lot of houses where the staff, led by the director, are very burnt out. Their salaries are low: nannies have 5-8 thousand rubles, and they can have up to 50 bedridden elderly people for two in a shift - and at night she can be alone on her floor. They don’t need anything other than to ensure biological life. That is, somewhere they will spoon-feed a bedridden grandmother, shake her in every possible way - and she will get up after a hip fracture, walk even with a walker and retain her sanity. Somewhere they will say “she’s taken ill” and leave it like that, and when she withdraws into herself, they will say: “She’s unwell, don’t come near her again,” and she will die very soon.

There are no cases of criminal desire to quickly transport grandmothers to the next world in state nursing homes. In extreme cases, per capita funding (if you kill everyone, you'll be left with nothing) and prosecutorial and other checks insure against this. But there are plenty of cases of complete indifference - “they don’t need anything, they’re not themselves” - despite the fact that grandmothers really need communication, comfort, and personal attention.

Fortunately, this burnout is treatable in many cases. It’s easier in small houses, where the troubles were due to poverty. We have seen several cases of turning a stinking barracks into a completely cozy place simply because nurses, instead of bleach, were given normal detergents in decent quantities, diapers for bedridden people, additional bedding, and gloves. And they perked up, because they were so sure that neither they nor their grandmothers were needed by anyone.

It’s more difficult in big houses - there you need a lot of diapers, and detergents, and while you have a heart-to-heart talk with each of the staff (not to teach something, but just to talk like a human being, maybe she has three children at home who are underfed with her salary), a lot of time passes.

Yes, here and there someone steals. We have seen exemplary houses where everything is perfect precisely at the expense of the budget. We didn’t catch anyone by the hand - we have a different specialization, we don’t investigative committee, we simply compare what happens with a caring director and what happens in other cases. However, funding varies from region to region, and the building could be built in 1905, or maybe built in 1985.

Big houses are good. With attention to the bedridden, with work and creative workshops, with walks. And there are bad ones - both large boarding schools and small ones, where grandmothers are asked for money for help in washing, money for going outside to breathe, where feet stick to the floor, etc.

Why private nursing homes are better than public ones

State nursing homes are not free, as many people think - they take 75% of the pension. I know nursing wards where they take 95%. There are social beds in state nursing wards and boarding schools, where relatives provide additional payment (for example, for some reason, my grandmother does not have the right to a place only for deductions from her pension). In the Moscow region last year, the additional payment was 22–25 thousand rubles per bed per month, that is, 75% of the pension plus these 22–25 thousand rubles. And these are quite ordinary rooms, four people per room and no preferences. It’s relatively good there, our volunteers even pay for such wards for one grandmother, for whom the state only offers others that are worse.

All kinds of boarding houses such as “Kindness”, “Caring”, Senior Group (physically they are in the Moscow region, but are considered Moscow), Boarding house for the elderly - all these are private networks. Senior Group helps us as much as they can: they conducted short trainings for staff of state houses from the regions, took in and raised our bedridden blind grandfather when he was about to die, etc. But the price of living in such a boarding house goes beyond 100 thousand per month, as far as I know. We are not personally familiar with other private networks. But if the cost of living is approximately 30 thousand rubles per month, then this is not guaranteed Better conditions, and the staff, most likely, are not even without education - even without medical books. A shelter in the Vladimir region where dead and half-dead old people were found was in the news; accommodation there cost 22 thousand a month.

A good private house (from Senior Group, for example) corresponds to, say, an Israeli one. That is, there are no bedridden people there as a class: even if a person is in a vegetative state, they wash him in the morning, put him in a stroller, take him to breakfast in the dining room (even pureed food from a spoon, but not in bed through a sippy cup), then take him to all sorts of morning news viewings and discussion, then for a walk.

There is round-the-clock supervision for those who are unconscious, classes in all kinds of art therapy and music, a psychologist, visits from dentists and cardiologists, and so on. In such places, people who are bedridden get up, and relatives are invited to all holidays. In bad private nursing homes, everything is either the same as in bad public nursing homes, or - in criminal cases - it can be much worse.

What it's like to live in a Russian nursing home

Guests of the Pervomaisky house in the Tula region tell their stories

Grandmother Evdokia

Photo: Maria Borodina

We walk here and there, go downstairs three times a day to the dining room for training. Someone is sick, someone can still walk. We also have Masha, Lida, and Zoya on our floor. Zoya is now in the hospital. We came from Belev. At home, of course, it’s better, but at home there’s no one.

Houses - wood heating, hot water no, there is no gas, but the bath and toilet are separate. We have been living in the Tula region for 20 years, and our entire village was without gas, we only heated it with wood. Lately I haven’t even cultivated the garden anymore, I didn’t have the strength.

My birthday is this month - October 28th, and a month ago my great-grandson was born. Weight 4500 - hero, Caesarean section was performed. They called me Ilya. Now I’ll show you my daughter, she was beautiful. She died at 52 and two years old. After her death I wandered around these houses. I often look at photographs - this is how we will survive the winter. Volunteers came from Tula, there was a concert in the dining room, homemade cakes, it was so great. We also have our own accordion player - he plays on Tuesday and Friday at three o'clock, some of them sing. Today my granddaughter came to see me by correspondence, we saw each other for the first time, we have been corresponding since March 29th. At first I thought from the start that this was my youngest daughter. They have two cars, they could come, but they don’t come.

We have a lot of people corresponding with us. A girl, her granddaughter, also visits Bogomolova by correspondence. I gave her a robe and a sleeveless vest; she often visits. They write to Filippova the most, sending photographs and gifts. True, she is now going to Tula to have an eye operation, I am worried about her.

Grandma Zina

Photo: Maria Borodina

I’ve already had my third stroke, and I’m learning to walk again. I've been here for three months. But I almost learned to walk. I was born in Plavsk, I am from Plavsk. I have no one, only my niece, and she comes to me. For lonely people like me, it's good here.

Returning to the main building by New Year is my dream. You just need to heal. Between the recumbent body and the non-recumbent one - big difference. We walk around the territory there. But here it’s not very interesting, there’s little communication. I have a fiance there. Now I’ll learn to get up from the potty, my leg will adapt, and I’ll go back to it.

His name is Alexander, he comes to see me every day, we’ve been talking for two years now, so everything is fine. I like him so much! Do you know what a good character is? Not rude at all. True, he is paralyzed, but he comes to see me every day. He always says hello and goodbye to all my neighbors. He is kind. And in appearance it seems like nothing.

When I only had two strokes, we walked and went to concerts together. They even offered us to live together; they wanted to give us a separate room. But I’m not ready for this yet. Maybe by the First of May, in the spring. I need to recover now, not about family life think. And then, what kind of wife am I? He came to me one time, took off his socks and put them on the table. He wanted me to do the laundry. I ask why put it on the table? I would say: wash it. I washed them, of course, and he put them back on the table, clean, but on the table. I told him: “Sasha, why are socks on the table?” But he is very good and kind.

My niece is a miracle, she comes to me and communicates with me. Her son and daughter are adults, very decent, like her mother herself, they are doctors. I need to be looked after constantly, but they can’t.

I always said that I wouldn’t survive a third stroke, but it turned out - wait for the fourth. They tell me that I’m young, I’m only 66. True, Alexander is still not very happy with me: I walk around here in a robe, not always combed. I told him you New Year wait, I’ll dress up and get myself in order. And recently she asked: “Aren’t you going to leave me?” He said not yet. And he came recently and said that he definitely wouldn’t quit. Thank you God. Well, on the other hand, who will he find better than me? And you know what women are like here, because a woman needs a man even at 90 years old. I told him that no one needs him but me. But then I regretted it, he’s good.

Grandpa Kolya

Photo: Maria Borodina

Photo: Maria Borodina

Photo: Maria Borodina

I'm from Tula. My son died of a stroke in Moscow, and almost immediately after that my grandson died. As soon as my grandson died, I had a heart attack - my legs gave out, and that’s how I ended up here. I have a special exercise machine for exercise. I really want to walk, I want to get up and go see my house in Tula, what it looks like now. I worked on a collective farm from the age of 13. Life is already ending, but we have only recently begun to live. But I still have a goal - I want to get up on my own, without help.

Grandma Raya

Photo: Maria Borodina

I am Baba Raya. When I was young, I had an accident, I was diagnosed, and I was unable to give birth to children. I do not have anyone.

Grandfather Vitya

Photo: Maria Borodina

It’s my birthday on Wednesday - well, I’m still young, I’m only about seventeen hundred. My family will come to see me, my grandson is 30 years old, he will bring everyone, they will amuse us, the whole ward. He is my captain, his name is Denis.

I was a senior operator at a chemical plant; I worked for 28 years until I was 75 years old. My pension is 25,000, is that okay? Of course it will do. Some get 10-13 thousand. I served in Sevastopol, in the navy, for four and a half years, and the volunteers remembered and brought Crimean photographs and postcards - very nice and beautiful. I look and cry, but these are tears of joy, tears of memories.

In general, I understood: the main thing is family, when you have children, nothing is scary. PI constantly replay in my head memories of my youth, my childhood. I didn’t finish my studies myself, my parents were old, I had to look after and help. Fate is like that, well, nothing. Each person has his own destiny. The daughter is a high school teacher, teaches French, and has now become the head teacher at the gymnasium. Grandson Denis loves me very much. My granddaughter lives in America - Masha, a beauty. When she was a 4th year student in Moscow, she went to America for an internship, she liked it, found a man, fell in love with him, got married and stayed there. My husband's parents are Russian, and he himself was born in America. Masha has been living there for two years, but she talks so well. He told his parents that this was his wife and he would never let her go anywhere. That's how it should be. We love her very much. She hasn’t come to see me yet, but she promises.

Grandfather Gennady

Photo: Maria Borodina

I was born in the village of Shamai, Pizhansky district, Kirov region, I worked there as a signalman. I was here only the first night, my son-in-law brought me here, and he himself went to Moscow. Don't kiss me, I'm unshaven. You can take a photo. My last name is beautiful - Hristolyubov.

Grandfather Valera

Photo: Maria Borodina

Photo: Maria Borodina

I was born in Belarus. Close relatives have died or died. I worked on a collective farm, then they transferred me to a state farm, and they started paying me money. But not enough. The pension is absolutely minimal. Then I came to Tula, we have a three-room apartment here, 9 people live in it - relatives, my sister’s children. They bought me a folding chair, and my niece and her husband slept on the floor. I was very uncomfortable that they were sleeping on the floor, I asked to be brought here so that they would have a place to sleep. They didn’t want to let me go, but I asked for it myself. It's hard for me. Volunteers come to me, they are like granddaughters and grandsons to me. They bring gifts and photographs. In general, I have a great-granddaughter - Mashenka. I've been here for three years now. Every day I pray. This is my life.

Grandma Masha

Photo: Maria Borodina

I am Maria Mikhailovna, but better than Baba Masha, I was born in 1930 on January 14, I am a peasant. Tula region, Kireyevsky district. Although I am deaf, I sing well, I love to sing - and I loved to scream.

I worked in a mine as a coal handler, and in a construction site I worked as a bricklayer. My uncle arranged it for me; they didn’t just let us leave the collective farm. And then I got sick - I have glaucoma. I can’t lift heavy things, and I retired at 50 years old. I wanted to work, but my mother had a heart attack. Mom died, I cried a lot for my mother. My brother lived with me and was afraid that I would go crazy. I buried him and was left completely alone. I was hit by a car, I had a fracture in three places, I spent six months in the district hospital. Then they transferred here.

Soon it will be five years since I have been here. A week later my cousin Galya comes to visit me. She washes everything for me, brings me gifts, takes care of me too, she is 68 years old, she worked as a teacher. But I’m already used to it here. I get up, straighten the bed and do exercises for more than 30 minutes. The girls who work here help us. They support us. Many of us have children, but they don’t come, I’m surprised at the nature of people.

I was married, lived in marriage for five months. The husband drank, God knows what he did. I don’t want to look at men at all. Make no mistake. I don’t believe that you can’t live without them, but you can’t get confused with one or the other either. And if you get married, respect your husband. It would be nice if he didn’t live with his mother, you’ll be nicer.

Whoever wishes me harm, I still don’t wish him to live alone. What if we stayed at home? So why should we do one there at a time? Our beds are always clean here, breakfast and lunch are good. Warm. Health is very important. And we sang well with you today. After all, there are good people in Russia, thank you, don’t scold me for wheezing when I sang.

Grandma Galya

It’s scary to say how old I am: 82 years old. I was born in the village of Butyrka. I worked at the sanitary and epidemiological station, and then at the age of 45 I was given a disability group: diagnosed with polyarthritis. It's incurable. I had an operation twenty years ago, they said I wouldn’t live more than three months, but I still live. My husband cried and cried and buried me, but I stayed.We didn’t have children, I couldn’t give birth, that’s the diagnosis. But we lived well, together, in love. And he kept telling me these three months how I would live without Galka, how I would live without my Galka. And then I buried him. Such is life, dear ones.

Photo: Maria Borodina

Baba Valya I. I have always loved and love our youth. At first I worked in a kindergarten, got a job there as a nanny, and was hired as a cook. I cooked food for the children, you know how delicious it was, I cooked it better than anyone else. In prison I worked on the telephone, next to the cells. I was the controller, I looked through the peephole so that there were no fights or conflicts. And if there’s a fight, there’s a phone nearby, you call and they’ll come to sort it out. The doors were locked with two locks, but I have the keys, I don’t open them - it’s not supposed to. In my youth I could assemble and disassemble a pistol, but I couldn’t do a rifle. Then they fired me. Valentina Vasilievna, senior sergeant. It’s written like that, but what’s the point?

And I went to work as a cleaner. They paid little. In the hospital again as a cook, she lived in Skuratovo, went to six o’clock in the morning, served breakfast to everyone. I knew how to do everything. After all, in life, as it is, if you know how, you can live everywhere.

This is only my third year here. I have two daughters - born 69 and 72 years old, they sold the apartment, and I was left with nothing. I’m from Tula in general, I lived next to the Zarya store, on Galkina Street, on the fourth floor. My husband and I lived together for 40 years, but he left before that.I haven’t seen my eldest daughter Galya for 15 years, the youngest came. Life in general is a toss up. I’m embarrassed to take pictures, they’ll ask later where you got this. I’ll put on a scarf and hello, I’m your aunt. I'll go dance, I'm a jack of all trades.

Grandma Anya

Photo: Maria Borodina

I've been here for four years. In my youth I worked at a military factory, as a motor operator, in a mine - I had to suffer everywhere. And my family life is bad, there is always separation and separation. So I sing with you, from separation. I have a great-granddaughter - Dasha, small, beautiful. She gave birth to a granddaughter from an Armenian, he good husband. Dasha dances and sings, they are cheerful people. My granddaughter's husband loves her. What I want to say is, live together, never offend your suitors, otherwise we girls bite too.

Grandma Tamara

Photo: Maria Borodina

Natasha Lavrova writes letters to me, she is a volunteer from Moscow. She is studying now, she cannot come, she has to study a lot. She is my pen-pal granddaughter. I was born not far from here, in Shchekino, in the Tula region, and worked as a cleaner. This winter I will be 77 years old on February 3rd. Children don't come to me. I call them, they have problems there, no luck with work, something else. I'm a stranger to them. On March 13th it will be 4 years since I have been here. It’s good to have both a mother and a father in the family. Children should grow up this way.

Our nurses are good, they are for us. I understand everything, it’s hard with grannies, one doesn’t hear, the other doesn’t walk, the third doesn’t see. I'm Tamara Borisovna Kryuchkova from room 97, it's on the second floor. Write me letters.

This material would not have been possible without the “Old Age in Joy” Foundation, which helps residents 120 nursing homes from the Moscow region to Tatarstan. The foundation collects donations for treatment, pays for additional staff and sends care assistants. Volunteers bring linen, clothes, strollers, and personal care products. They also organize tea parties with sweets and songs. An important part of the foundation's work is regular correspondence with the elderly. You too can start and maintain communication with people who have no one.

In our country, they don’t really like to understand the nuances and details, but discussing and condemning someone is a real no-brainer. Many people have a set of stereotypes in their heads, within the framework of which they smear all sorts of negativity and obscenity around others. This can be seen in a number of examples, but the most striking and obvious one is related to nursing homes. It’s like a reflex is triggered: if someone in the family has someone in such a boarding house, insults immediately begin behind their back.

“Yeah! Surrendered your loved ones! Inhumans. How the earth carries you” And so on and so forth.

Let’s try to dive into this issue together today, and let’s not turn a blind eye to the details and fates.

How do old people live in nursing homes? How do they get there? What do they eat? What do they dream about? What are they doing? I will try to answer these and other questions in my post...

We are going to one of the nursing homes in our city.

I passed by this inconspicuous building many times. But this is a whole object of cultural heritage. This is where the private boarding house for the elderly “Golden Autumn” is located

The story of its appearance is unusual. His future owner's elderly father-in-law became very ill. She herself is not the youngest woman. And at the same time with severe kidney disease. If she or her husband quit their job, it would be the end.

I had to find a way out of the situation - hire nurses. Then she and her family studied the experience of private homes for the elderly. And we decided to organize our own small one. Over time, the number of guests increased. We had to look for new premises and increase the number of employees.

Over four years, more than 500 guests visited the Golden Autumn boarding house for the elderly.

Today fifty people live there.

In my opinion, a private boarding house is a mixture of a hotel, " kindergarten"and a medical facility.

Hotel - stay here from several days to several years. For example: a person goes to the hospital for examination, but there is no one to leave with an elderly relative. So for the time being the examination is brought here

“Kindergarten” - some elderly people are brought here in the morning and picked up from here in the evening. Their relatives go to work and cannot be left alone in the house. Everyone’s condition is very different; some people forget that they took the pills and may take them five to seven times at home. And in the boarding house there is constant supervision

Near-medical institution - necessary medical and psychological assistance is provided. There is special food and qualified personnel

The rooms are all the same. Only the beds with special equipment differ.

The rooms accommodate from 2 to 4 people.

You and I are all very different. Each of us has our own story. And the people in the boarding house also have very different situations.

There are also lonely people here. Some outlived their children, others simply did not have them.

Some strong problems with health, including memory. They live in some kind of their own world, not recognizing anyone and remembering themselves at a certain age.

Some people have relatives who work on a rotational basis or in other cities.

All stories are completely different. For this reason, I kindly ask you not to preemptively slander people you know nothing about just because someone close to them receives care in such places.

This is what the toilet room looks like.

You can come to this private boarding house at any time and see everything for yourself. I think it’s very important to see everything with your own eyes without any warnings.

Here is the daily routine.

Two little kittens live in the boarding house. Guests simply love them

A variety of events take place in the assembly hall. There is also a TV.

Meals six times a day.

The kitchen is clean. The chefs are very responsive.

The cuisine is very different from regular table food. It tastes like homemade.

When people come here “to explore”, they are not only shown everything, but also given a chance to try the local cuisine.

The people who live here are not the richest (they have no problem hiring several caregivers)

In addition to various concerts and meetings with guests, they go for walks. For you and me, taking a breath of air is commonplace, but some pensioners with limited mobility began to walk here for the first time. It's hard to imagine how normal conditions a person in a wheelchair would descend from the fifth floor...

He also has his own garden

The eggs are also our own - natural.

Many products come to the table from the farm

They even got a goat. Now the weakest are given milk.

The residents really enjoy their guests. Schoolchildren do not come often, but every time it is a holiday. Recently, children from a neighboring school prepared a concert, after which they were not allowed to go for another two hours. and they told, they told, they told...

If schoolchildren or their parents read me, my precious ones, you are always welcome there.

Some citizens may ask why they eat on the street. Don't worry. It's just this once. There was just a small concert with an accordion player and songs, and at the request of the residents we combined it with food in the fresh air (until it was cold)

Everyone there is very different. Some have a clear consciousness, while others no longer perceive much. But everyone already needs care.

Age varies, but people remain people, and sometimes they even fall in love with each other.

Life is a very multifaceted thing. And you can never renounce anything.

And you shouldn’t judge people who cannot independently care for their loved ones. There are many reasons and we definitely have no right to look for a speck in someone else’s eye, especially if it’s not there...

P.S. We have a very large country. And people are all different. Nursing homes, even private ones, can also be very diverse. If necessary, study everything carefully yourself. I showed the private boarding house for elderly people “Golden Autumn”, they have something like this. Somewhere it can be better, and somewhere worse.

P.P.S. In terms of safety, I foresee the question - what about the fire alarm - it's new.

P.P.P.S. Some citizens may not particularly like the façade of the building. I remind them especially for them - this is a cultural heritage site. And according to all the rules, its external repairs require as much money as the boarding house would not earn in 30 years.

All older people, regardless of their profession or marital status, deserve a decent life in old age.

There are 12 nursing homes in the Kyiv region, where about 600 people live under state care. The vast majority of them are abandoned, lonely, sick, they cannot take care of themselves and need constant attention and care.

How do old people live out their last days in such places? These are houses that have not seen repairs for decades, these are shabby walls, these are creaky beds with old mattresses, holey floors and iron utensils.

We went to one of these centers together with the “Gidna Old Age” project, which is reforming the conditions for boarding schools where elderly and lonely people live.

“Coming to such houses, we see that these people eat from iron bowls, drink from iron mugs and sleep on beds that they should not sleep on.” old man. We want and change these conditions. We do cosmetic repairs, replace dishes, beds, and equipment. We would like to install a staff call button and create rest rooms. But changes in such places begin with us and our attitude towards older people,” says Vita Sidorenko, manager-organizer of the project’s off-site events.

All houses are located in rural areas. As a rule, rural people go to work there without having either qualifications or appropriate education.

“Staff training is very important. We want to teach the staff to help these people, work with these people, take care of these people,” continues Vita.

3 stories about how to get into a nursing home

In the nursing home in the village of Gruzka there live 20 old people - 11 grandmothers and 9 grandfathers. 9 residents have disabilities of various social categories.

They end up in such houses different people- there are lonely people who need care and can no longer bear living alone. Such people, as a rule, are looked after by social service workers, and then they write an appeal.

There are those who outlived their children, and those who became orphans with living children.

“There are also stories where elderly parents need care after illness, but a daughter or son is already raising their children alone. And here people are faced with a choice - mother or father to a nursing home or children to an orphanage. There is no money for a nurse, the parent needs attention , but it’s impossible to quit work,” says Vladimir Darmoroz, head of the inpatient department for permanent or temporary stay of single and disabled citizens.

This is how one woman, brought by her niece, ended up in this house. A woman born in 1921, due to her age, she needs specialized care. There were times when she left the house, forgot the way back, and people searched for her for weeks.

“She came to live in Kyiv from Sukhumi, and her relatives remained in Georgia. In Kyiv she has only a niece and great-nephews. If she was left alone, she could mix up her medications, take all the pills, drops, and forget where the toilet is. Here she is under supervision. My niece gave her away with a heavy heart, she was ashamed, but she didn’t have time to care for the old lady,” says Vladimir.

All the residents of the house are very different people with different fates and circumstances.

Olga Kuzminichna is from Chelyabinsk. In the past, a former accountant of the space agency, familiar with many cosmonauts, was at the Baikonur launch site. Living in noisy Kyiv, closer to old age, I began to be drawn to nature and gradually moved to a dacha near the capital.

She was admitted to the home due to progressive Parkinson's disease. The woman has already developed dementia and has memory problems.

"She remembers stories from her youth, what happened to her once. But she forgets about what happened 5 minutes ago. She may become depressed,
She has a daughter, but she works, she has her own family. She cannot come to her dacha in the region every day. There were also nurses, but not everyone did their job conscientiously,” says Vladimir.

Her neighbor Olga Fedorovna suffered a stroke. She has a son, but it is psychologically difficult for him to care for his mother.

“Olga Fedorovna needs special care - change her diaper, wash her, turn her over. My son has psychological barriers in this regard that are difficult to overcome. His wife could look after her, but the woman is now undergoing chemotherapy - she was diagnosed with oncology,” says about the old lady director.

The woman also has another daughter, but unfortunately, she does not take part in her life.

Older people really appreciate attention

Old people enjoy communication and attention like children. Any help - helping them get up, covering them with a blanket, moving a table, a smile, coming up, holding their hand - is very valuable for each of them.

“It’s great that you came! Angels! What a joy!” one of the residents of the house enthusiastically greets us. Tears appear in the woman's eyes from joy.

Noticing movement in the corridor, Olga Fedorovna called me to her.

“Donyu, aren’t you afraid of me? Adjust the pillow for me so that I can lie down. Cover me with a blanket, birdie. Thank you very much,” a smile appears on the woman’s face.

The woman eats very poorly - there is lunch next to her bed, which is almost untouched. The nurse, taking the plate, grumbles a little: “Olga Fedorovna, will you finish eating? This is pilaf, delicious. With meat, just the way you like it.”

From another ward my grandmother also calls me to her: “Come in, I’ll at least take a look at you. Sit down. Why are you so pale? Maybe you need to be fed? Volodya (calls the director), the girl here is hungry!”

A person, bedridden, left to his own devices, completely deprived of attention and emotional support, sets himself up to “survive”, begins to think about imminent death and feel sad.

He closes himself off from the outside and goes into his inner world, which is more comfortable for himself. Perhaps this is why old people seem grouchy and embittered to us.

But everyone can show a different reality and make the world brighter for an elderly person. You just need a little more patience, time and interest in what is inside them.

For 20 old people - 1 TV

For everyone living in the house there is one small room with a TV, several sofas and a library.

“Men want to watch films about war, football, sports. Women like to watch TV series and concerts. But there is no such thing as swearing behind the screen,” the director shares.

Vladimir Nikolaevich and the leisure room. Photo "Let's Help".

The building was formerly a rural hospital; there is not even a separate leisure room.

In the near future, Vladimir has plans to equip a comfortable veranda, protected from the wind and sun, for conversations and communication between old people.

The residents of the house themselves are happy to spend more time outside and not sit within four walls. One grandmother is already looking forward to spring and wants to garden.

“I’m a field farmer myself. Come in the spring, let’s plant flowers and vegetables,” the woman asks.

How to create comfort

As part of the “Dignified Old Age” program, old people in Gruzkoye have already received new comfortable beds, along with modern mattresses and new linen, as well as glass-ceramic unbreakable dishes instead of terrible iron bowls.

The house has become very warm - the windows have already been replaced, but the slopes remain to be done.

During our visit, measurements were taken for sewing curtains.

Old dishes that were previously used by residents.Photo "Let's Help".

“The state doesn’t help us much. Everything that has been done here has been done by the Lets Help foundation. They updated the beds, changed the windows, dishes, bed linen, pillows, blankets. Household chemicals, diapers and so on - they help us all,” says the director of the house.

The establishment needs not only finances. Psychologists and volunteers are needed to bring the old people out of the weak and apathetic state in which they are now.

Everyone can help

None of us are immune from lonely old age. But everyone can make sure that old people are no longer treated as “extra burden” and “outcasts.”

Elderly people living here (and not only) need attention - they feel abandoned and forgotten.

If you came to them and reminded them that this world does not end within the confines of a nursing home, it would greatly help them and improve their quality of life.

The “Dignified Old Age” program is the first in Ukraine that aims to completely change the living conditions of lonely old people in 12 houses in the Kyiv region. The program is designed for 3 years, its funding is estimated at 30 million hryvnia.

On the Let's Help website there are details on each item and reporting.

They are also waiting for volunteers who are ready to come to the homes of the elderly. For coordination please contact

In Russia today there are over 1.5 thousand boarding houses for the elderly. Nursing homes for the elderly seem something terrible to many. Their specificity is fundamentally different from that which was characteristic of these institutions in Soviet times and in the 90s of the last century. First of all, the quality of service delivery has changed.

If earlier aged people In these institutions they simply “lived out” their days, but now many guests who have visited boarding houses call them sanatoriums. This is confirmed by a radical change in the internal appearance of the premises itself, treatment rooms, common rooms, as well as living rooms. All these innovations have led to the fact that over the past few years the average life expectancy in boarding houses has increased significantly. According to statistics, senior citizens living in them live 5-10 years longer than all other residents of our country. If in Russia the average life expectancy is 69 years, then in many nursing homes this figure is 75-79 years.

Meanwhile, society's attitude towards these institutions has not changed. They are still considered old-age homes and are not perceived as progressive institutions. This is probably correct, since the high level of institutions can lead to the risk of an increase in those wishing to join the ranks of residents. From a government point of view, this should not be encouraged, since the family with its traditional values ​​of caring for loved ones should always come first. Meanwhile, data from boarding houses suggests that most of the guests belong to the family category. They have close relatives, children and grandchildren, but their families no longer need them. The reasons why relatives transfer elderly people to the care of boarding houses can be different, and it is difficult to judge them for this.

To an elderly person who, of his own free will or due to some difficult life situation, may end up in this social institution, it is important to understand that this may be the best way out for him. Advantages of living in boarding houses a bunch of. One of the best is the Barvikha boarding house for the elderly. For the majority of elderly people who end up in an institution, this is a great opportunity to start a new life, the beginning of new achievements and even victories.

Pros of nursing homes

For older people It is very important to feel protected. This is a period of exacerbation of various diseases and ailments. Living in such a house, you can be confident in the future. They will definitely feed you, give you shoes, dress you, provide you with the necessary medications, and wash your things. Now many such institutions have received autonomous status, began to provide paid services to residents of nearby territories, and expanded the list of services provided. This has been a plus for residents in the sense that they also have access to all treatment rooms and new services.

2. Possibility of self-expression.

In all institutions of this type, circle work is actively carried out. All kinds of activities, such as singing, dancing, computer training, sewing, are aimed at organizing permanent leisure time for residents. Every year, various competitions of crafts and amateur performances are held between institutions, where citizens who have never done anything like this in their previous lives can express themselves.

Cons of nursing homes

The main thing that a future guest may lose is the loss of some independence and a sense of self-sufficiency. For people of the “old school” this can come as a real shock. In order to smooth out the moment of relocation, professional psychologists work in such institutions who communicate with patients on various topics, helping them resolve their internal conflicts. There are also psychological relief rooms and mutual assistance for residents.

An important point is the fact that accommodation in a boarding house may be temporary, from 2 to 6 months. After this period, you can either return to your previous place of residence or choose a boarding house as your permanent place of residence.

How much does it cost to stay in boarding houses?

These institutions are public and private. Living in private boarding houses is usually paid for by relatives or sponsors, since pensions are not always enough for this. In government institutions, 75% of residents' pensions are written off monthly to pay for maintenance, and the rest is given to the elderly for personal use.

How to register for a nursing home for the elderly

State boarding houses are under the authority of the authorities social protection. Therefore, you can obtain complete information about the activities of these institutions, their number and locations from the local social security authority. Typically, specialists from this department require, in addition to the application, to provide the following package of documents:

• certificate of disability (if any);
• applicant's passport;
• compulsory medical insurance policy;
• pension certificate.

The decision to issue a voucher to a boarding house is made by a specially created commission in social security. All documents are checked, and the factors on the basis of which a pensioner is proposed to be assigned to a boarding house are also subject to in-depth analysis.