It happens that you meet a man, love him, but something in his character worries you. If you find yourself in a similar situation, we suggest you check for an hour to see if he is a coward. If you are a coward, then the relationship is doomed and something needs to be changed.
Fear hides in everyone. Most men shove it away because being a coward is “ugly.” But sometimes, it still breaks out and greatly spoils the relationship. When a man tries to please you in every possible way, you think: “He really loves me.” And you are sure of this, without even suspecting that behind such a manifestation of feelings the most common cowardice may be hidden. Here are nine well-disguised markers that indicate a man is a real coward.
1. Inability to stand up for yourself
A cowardly man always listens to the opinions of others, acts according to someone else's orders, and lives as society dictates to him. He tries in every possible way to please and cannot refuse to fulfill other people's requests. This is mainly done for the sake of general fertilizer, and the manager most often becomes a mother, father, wife or friend.
If such a man is faced with rudeness and danger in a public place, he will not do anything. He will not defend his position before his superiors and will not protect his beloved from the attack of hooligans.
2. Lack of determination
A coward, as you know, doubts with or without reason. Even in the supermarket, he can think for a long time about what milk to get. More difficult life problems can drive him into the abyss of hesitation for a long time. The fact is that such a man is simply afraid of responsibility, defeat, change and conflict. He likes to live in his “comfort zone,” even if it is not characterized by the most positive conditions. So you shouldn’t expect a marriage proposal from him; a stamp in your passport can only be achieved after a series of persistent hints.
3. Passing the buck
All the most difficult and responsible decisions are shifted to women's shoulders. It is this type of man who runs away from pregnant girls, disappears from the scene of an accident, and disappears from the radar if complex problems arise on the horizon.
4. Inability to express emotions
Hypersensitive people prefer to keep everything to themselves, which sometimes leads to cowardice. A representative of weak men is not able to object to the bosses who are withholding wages. He is afraid to court a woman. Therefore, if when communicating with a man you have to constantly look for a way out of awkward pauses or make decisions for him, you should be wary.
5. Lack of ambition
Weak men often do not live the way they want, but in order to maintain stability and adhere to a minimum level of responsibility.
6. Bad habits
Alcoholism, drug addiction - all this is a manifestation of weakness, a way to escape from the real world. A cowardly man prefers to drink away his problems rather than solve them.
7. Mean actions
Many men with coward syndrome commit vile and openly treacherous acts. They run away at the first danger. For them, nothing exists except their own peace and well-being.
8. Slow response
A real man makes decisions quickly, not only in stressful, but also in ordinary everyday situations. A coward, on the other hand, is lost and immersed in fear.
9. Love for sorority
In the company of other men who are more successful, rich and ambitious, the coward feels awkward, so he prefers to communicate with women, feeding his self-esteem and Ego at the expense of those who are much weaker.
Each of the signs individually is not yet an indicator of cowardice. But if you encounter more than 3 signs, you should know that the man lacks courage. A man's weakness extends to all areas of his life. This is why cowardly men often become real losers.
Do not forget that any woman needs a strong partner who is not afraid of anything or anyone, who is ready to take responsibility and provide the woman with everything she needs. Courage is real masculine actions that allow a woman to feel weak, fragile and truly happy. Love yourself, and don't forget to press the buttons and
For several years now, while I have had my website, the article alone has enjoyed constant popularity, “Signs of a weak man,” and recently, checking the statistics on the site, the phrases that people ask in search engines and come to my article (usually these are “characteristics of a weak man ”, “how to understand that a man is weak”, “how to build a relationship with a weak man”), I saw that someone typed in the request: “how not to kill a cowardly man.” Well, I think that's it, we've arrived! Nice girls are driven to despair by weak men and are ready to take drastic measures.
In order not to kill a cowardly man, his qualities need to be “considered from the very beginning,” without rushing to “jump” into a relationship with him.
So, 5 signs of a weak man:
- Victim mindset/loser mindset. This kind of thinking includes: blaming everyone and everything for one’s failures, a complete refusal to take responsibility for one’s life, shifting this very responsibility onto anyone, from own parents to the president of the country. And as a consequence of the above, we come to the second point.
- Professes the rule of life: “Better a bird in the hands than a pie in the sky,” that is refusal of any risks in life. He will work at a boring and hated job, dreaming that if it weren’t for “this stupid city, this stupid government, these women are all mercantile bitches,” then his dream of working at his favorite job would come true.
- Boasting and bravado. The number of “fairy tales” told to women (especially on first dates) simply puts Charles Perrault and the Brothers Grimm to shame. So all his stories about his merits, accomplishments and achievements must be “divided by 50” and “removing the spaghetti from your ears with a fork.”
- Inability to cope with any stress on an emotional level. Any, even the slightest problem drives him into a stupor, and the subsequent reaction may be to go into “another reality”: drinking, drugs, promiscuous sex, computer games, pornography, or indeed “departure to another world.”
Every girl dreams of meeting a knight without fear or reproach. But what if you gave your heart to the “cowardly lion”? Is it possible to be happy with a timid man? How to Cultivate Courage in an indecisive life partner?.
How to recognize a coward?
Most main feature coward men - reluctance to make decisions.
A timid representative of the strong half of humanity is comfortable only when everything is decided for him. Therefore, he will definitely not take the initiative to be introduced to his girlfriend’s relatives, is unlikely to ask his boss for a salary increase, and will never refuse to help his friends, even to the detriment of his own interests.
You can also recognize a cowardly man by external signs:
- he is afraid to stand out from the crowd, so he dresses inconspicuously;
- restrained in showing emotions;
- avoids looking the interlocutor in the eyes for a long time;
- almost never gestures;
- often fiddling with some object in his hands.
Where do men who are cowards come from?
Psychologists say: cowardice is a character trait. It is usually formed in adolescence when males fight for dominance in a group. Adolescents who have failed to achieve a high position in the hierarchy develop a defensive reaction.
Future man begins to fear open conflict and turns into a social coward.
Alas, it is impossible to eradicate cowardice. This is a personality trait that you will have to come to terms with.
However, if not the bravest man will feel confident in yourself, he will be less likely to act like a coward. To a loving woman I can help him with this.
How to be happy with a coward?
In the description of the coward man, did you recognize your admirer or husband?
- Never call a man a coward, not jokingly, much less in the heat of a quarrel. The words “weakling”, “quiet”, “weeper”, etc. are also prohibited. A man should never guess that you consider him a coward. He will never forgive you for this. Remember: a man expects understanding from a woman, not revelation.
- Make a list of advantages his beloved, which compensate for his not the most enviable character trait. Record every little detail. For example, “he doesn’t forget to water the cacti when I go on a business trip,” “he knows who Schopenhauer is.” Refresh your notes from time to time.
- Avoid situations in which it is difficult for your man to detect courage. Are you being flooded by your neighbors for the third time in a year? Don’t expect that your husband will want to deal with unscrupulous citizens himself. Don't demand the impossible from him. Explain to your would-be neighbors yourself. You will kill two birds with one stone: you will solve the problem, God willing, and you will save the peace of mind of your loved one.
- Don't focus on signs of cowardice. Have you planned a romantic weekend, but your loved one couldn’t refuse his boss’s request to go to work on his day off? Moreover, did you witness how he slavishly babbled: “Peter Petrovich, I consider it happiness to work as much as possible for the benefit of my beloved company”? Pretend that nothing special happened. A man will readily believe this and will be grateful to you. And the holiday can be arranged a week later, right?
- Praise your partner as often as possible, especially in the presence of relatives and friends, but only when there is a reason. Clumsy flattery will make a man wary.
- Try to have fun from the realization that not a single problem can be solved without your participation. Think how many women dream of ruling over their husbands. You are just lucky!
To better understand your chosen one and save him from complexes, we also recommend reading the article on the website "". We wish you mutual understanding and harmonious relationships!
Copying this article is prohibited!
Rarely does a get-together with girlfriends go without discussing how cowardly and irresponsible modern men are. Psychologist Tatyana Strashuk believes that before labeling, you should understand the reasons for the behavior of your chosen one.
Just recently he said that you are his only one. And then suddenly disappeared without explanation. Now he hides and doesn't answer the phone when you call. And you cry into your friend’s vest, in your hearts calling him a coward. And really, why doesn’t he have the courage to admit honestly, looking into his eyes, that he no longer wants to continue the relationship?
Men and women cannot be measured by the same yardstick, warns psychologist Tatyana Strashuk. - Women often treat men without understanding how different we are. A woman, like a fish in water, feels in the inner “circle”. This is family, home, relationships with loved ones. The nature of a man is in external activity: conquest, work, protection, action. For the same reason, a man’s emotional sphere is not as developed as a woman’s. Most men, even when they discover moments of sensitivity in themselves, are afraid of them, considering them unmanly.
Thus, for a woman, emotions are her kingdom, for a man they are something dangerous and alarming. This is not their sphere, here they feel like “snakes in a hot frying pan.” And if a woman can have intimate conversations with her friends for hours, then for a man such conversations are a moment of extreme, almost intimate openness and vulnerability. And if so, then there is always the danger of “missing a shot.” Therefore, it is much easier for a man to prefer action to talking, even if the action is the choice of inaction, that is, avoiding the problem.
Now is it clear why your chosen one chose to hide instead of sorting things out with you? And indeed, many men admit that it is easier for them to “get punched in the face” than to be judged, to feel humiliated and insulted. But this is exactly what a man is afraid of conflict situations most.
So many men’s actions, which seem to us cowardice and baseness, are actually explained by fear of their own experiences and feelings. By avoiding solving problems, a man seems to forget about what worries him. Just because he's hiding and not answering his phone doesn't mean he's disrespectful towards you. He hides from himself, and at the same time protects his self-esteem. The fear of one’s own experiences, which will certainly arise at the moment of a difficult “debriefing” in a relationship, turns on such unconscious defense mechanisms in the psyche.
Getty Images/Fotobank
As soon as your friend became pregnant, her companion began to shake like a leaf. And then he asked for a time out and went to his mother for two weeks. And the husband of your other friend has been wiping his pants in a hateful position for several years now, receiving neither moral nor material satisfaction. At the same time, he desperately clings to this place, afraid of losing what he has. And at the women’s council you give both poor fellows a categorical diagnosis: a coward, an irresponsible infantile, a mama’s boy.
– You may have noticed that different people react differently to danger. Some freeze - fear paralyzes them, others, on the contrary, react quickly and flee. What may seem natural to a woman, such as pregnancy, may be perceived by a man as a signal of danger. And... escape.
In general, fear of responsibility is a fairly common phenomenon, especially in our time. And not only for men. Often it stems from an incorrect attitude towards the very concept of responsibility. In my practice, I have encountered the fact that the very word “responsibility” evokes fear and rejection in many. This means that everything that is directly or indirectly related to responsibility will be reflected in fear until a person realizes that in fact responsibility is something that happens to him every moment of his life, whether he wants it or not, whether he accepts it or not. it or runs from it. Because only the person himself is responsible for his life and everything that happens in it. It is he who receives all the consequences from his actions, thoughts, and words.
As long as a person is under the illusion that someone or something outside is responsible for what is happening to him, he will behave childishly and immaturely towards himself and others. Only the awareness that I and only I am the master of my life, the cause and effect of what is happening, allows a person to accept ALL the consequences of his actions.
What are the causes of irresponsible and immature behavior?
♦ A man in a family could be treated like a child for a long time, not trusting him with important matters. Therefore, he is accustomed to the fact that he is not the one who makes all the important decisions. In adult life, especially at critical moments, he reacts in a similar way - like a child who is waiting for someone to come and decide everything for him. And he lets everything take its course. After all, he lacks experience in accepting responsibility, faith in himself and his ability to make decisions.
♦ The man, on a subconscious level, has internalized the irresponsible behavior pattern of his father or others significant men in his family.
♦ The boy grew up without a father, and his mother performed two roles. However, she did not raise the child masculine qualities, did not explain male functions and psychological differences between the sexes. Especially if the child was the “navel of the universe,” and he was assigned only the royal role of “mama’s boy.” In adult life, such a man will expect decisions and actions from a woman, sincerely offended by demands to bear responsibility for his words and actions, not understanding why this is expected of him.
Is it possible to change a man's behavior?
Knowing the reasons makes it easier to understand the situation, but does not change it, says Tatyana Strashuk. - No one can ever change or remake anyone without personal desire. A person can influence something only through himself, realizing his own mistakes. And here the most important thing is the understanding of the woman herself, that she met just such a man for a reason, with something in herself she attracted him into her life. Apparently, some subconscious signals are emanating from her. the world, which are in tune with a man of such behavior. If they treat you irresponsibly, lie to you, then this most likely means that you are doing this to yourself. This means that it is possible to change this situation by researching: WHAT ABOUT ME attracts irresponsible and cowardly men into my life? Our relationships with the world, and especially with men, reflect our relationships with ourselves. After all, the world is a mirror in which everyone sees their own reflection.
Tatyana Koryakina
Man and cowardice are, at first glance, two contradictory concepts. However, the fact that a man is not afraid of mice and cockroaches, bloody scenes in films and even skydiving does not make him a daredevil. There are more than enough cowards, although their fears are more of a social nature.
Cowardly Lover
Lisa knows very well what the expression “cut the rug out from under your feet” means. Two months of a cloudless romantic relationship with her beloved ended one day when her friend simply stopped picking up the phone. Attempts to find out nothing yielded nothing. For several days of silence, Lisa almost went crazy, and then in Odnoklassniki she received a letter from him: “You are very good, but I have a lot of work now, and I cannot afford to take you lightly. Let's remain friends." The only thing that helped her survive the painful blow was the understanding that, fortunately, she did not have to throw in her lot with such a coward.
With the advent of SMS, the Internet and social networks It's real freedom for cowards! If you want to break up with your girlfriend - no problem: a short message - and you are free, you can go drink beer with friends. You don’t need to look into the eyes of your abandoned loved one, you don’t need to answer questions. Paradise! And what is happening to her is purely her personal grief.
The lowest cowardice is the inability to take responsibility for one's actions. You can safely cross this guy off the list of real men.
Cowardly boss
Marina has been working as a deputy general director in a large company for many years. There are many employees, and staff turnover is a constant phenomenon. I am satisfied with my work, but there is one “but”. “I have already developed a guilt complex! - she complains. - Every time the boss decides to fire someone, he entrusts this “honorable mission” to me, citing the fact that he has enough things to do. You have no idea how difficult it is to tell an employee that he is fired. Someone has a family, someone has a mother, someone is crying, someone is angry, but it’s up to me to listen to everything! Let him endure it all himself!”
Yes, the boss is an important, serious and always busy person. But this is not a reason to entrust your work to deputies, secretaries or other representatives. After all, the decision to fire an employee is made by the boss, which means he must be able to say so. It’s just a pity that there are few brave souls who can say this to his face.
Cowardly friend
“I hate these male “fraternities”! - Anya complains. - After a couple of glasses, my husband starts acting like an idiot! He’s ready to take off his shirt for his friends; he runs to them at the first call! One day in the middle of the night someone called and asked to meet me from the airport. My husband, naturally, went. I was proud that this was male friendship, I don’t understand. And this “friend” later, when he got married, didn’t even invite him to the wedding!”
Poems and songs have been written and films have been made about male friendship. Men look down on the so-called female friendship and condescendingly pat their friend on the shoulder: they say, well, be friends, be friends... until the first purchase of identical dresses. Only some people don’t even suspect that their relationships with friends have nothing to do with real male friendship. A coward man needs company to assert himself, and he will do his best to create it and try not to leave the “pride.” Friends invite you to a bar, but he has already promised his girlfriend an evening at home? It’s okay, the friend will survive, because a cowardly man is very scared that he may not be invited a second time. In general, it’s basically hard for him to say “no.” It's hard and scary.
And there is also back side medals: “you and I”, “we are for you”, and when the time comes - “I understand you, but my hut is on the edge.” As Leo Tolstoy said, a cowardly friend is worse than an enemy, because you fear the enemy, but rely on your friend.
Where do cowardly men come from?
The so-called social coward is a cowardly person with weak willpower and weak self-confidence. Unlike depression, cowardice is a character trait, and not a temporary state of the human psyche. Therefore, you should not have much hope that the coward will change. It's only in fairy tales that the Cowardly Lion is willing to do anything to gain courage. Real “cowardly lions” are fine anyway.
Where does cowardice come from? Like many of our problems and complexes, they come from childhood. During puberty, especially among male teenagers, the struggle for dominance in the group and the assertion of one’s “ego” begins to be clearly aggressive in nature (hello to school fights “class against class”). Against the background of this struggle, a number of adolescents develop a defensive reaction, expressed in submission with traces of hidden aggression. This defense subsequently leads to the development of cowardice - fear of open conflict and actions on the sly. When a boy grows up, cowardice can transform into cunning, but cunning is not good, and has nothing to do with ingenuity.
Is your man not a coward?
If you happen to fall in love with a coward, for a long time you won't even suspect it. When the first delights from the candy-bouquet period pass, take a closer look at his behavior and carefully ask about past novels. The first sign of cowardice is blaming the woman for everything, impartial words addressed to her and harsh criticism.
The concept of “cowardice” is very broad, and accusations of cowardice can be very controversial. If a young man, in response to attacks from hooligans, does not start a fight with them, this is prudence. If he doesn’t introduce a girl to her parents for 5 months, that’s reluctance. And if he doesn’t want to join the army, it’s a desire to build a career. Or is it cowardice?
Have you ever dealt with cowardly men?