I am a psychologist and a long-term mother. My daughter is 3 and 5.
I agree with those who wrote to you that you are not concerned about breastfeeding. The fact of sucking the breast and drinking breast milk in itself does not have a psychological effect on the child (except for the satisfied sucking reflex). Thus, we are talking about the influence on the child’s development not of breastfeeding as such, but of the child’s closeness to his mother. GV indeed often (not always) implies a high degree of it.
Theoretically, a high degree of closeness with a child, including physical, can be maintained without breastfeeding. Practice refutes this. Those women who do not breastfeed do not cuddle their baby as often. There is a theory that long-term feeding is a consequence of a woman’s readiness for a high degree of intimacy with another person, physical and psychological. Such readiness is relatively rare, which is why few feed for a long time. Few people are able to endure a close relationship with another person for long, because intimacy makes them vulnerable. This is a potential source of pain. The one who is closest can hurt the most. Keep at a distance, thereby avoiding strong feelings, easier. It often seems to me that women excommunicate for precisely this reason - to return to the usual “safe” alienation.
I will add that people get their first experience of pain due to intimacy in childhood, from their parents. It is then that defensive mental hardening begins, which does not allow later to have close relationships with one’s own children.
Another aspect is the development of independence and independence and the influence on them of a high degree of closeness with the mother.
The presence of a mother in a child's life - physical and emotional - is the key to a child's sense of security. A sense of security is a prerequisite for development, all its aspects. A person who feels in danger spends all his resources on identifying the source of danger and protecting himself; he has no internal opportunity to develop. This also applies to adults. In children, the basic need for security is satisfied through contact with the mother or the opportunity to establish this contact at any time.
The more secure a child feels, the sooner and more willingly he begins to separate from his mother and show independence. First he crawls away a few steps, then runs back a few meters, etc. From the age of 3, some children are able to painlessly spend several hours without loved ones.
The development of independence is hampered by parents' pedagogical extremes: either overprotection, in which the child is not allowed to act, feel and think independently and is instilled in him with the idea of his helplessness, or parental refusal to care, in which the child is constantly denied help and support, asking him to cope with everything on his own. . Both options are possible both with and without breastfeeding.
From personal experience: My daughter had constant access to the breast until at least 2.5 years old, and in the last year I sometimes refuse to feed when I am busy or reluctant. The child is not upset about this (if I was upset, I would not refuse). He falls asleep on his chest during the day. She exhibits all age-appropriate independence skills (eating, clothing, hygiene, cleaning, playing) and is well accustomed to kindergarten, starting from 3 years and 2 months. She spends 3-4 hours a day there (she has a snack in the morning, but has lunch and sleeps at home).
My daughter has always been very attached to me, very dependent on me, for the first year she didn’t get off her hands at all (and for the first six months she slept and washed herself only on me). She didn’t need anyone but me, neither adults nor children. And by the age of 3, constant contact and reliable attachment did their job: she calmly turned her back on me (figuratively and literally) and went to explore the world and people. Of course, she also comes running to suck the breast, but overall she is a very independent baby. She is more independent and stronger as a person than most other children. I believe that this is the result of a strong attachment, for which long-term breastfeeding has become a great support.
There are many different points of view about breastfeeding and the “correct” duration of this important period in the life of every person.
In my practical psychotherapeutic work, both with adults and with children, I usually try to learn in sufficient detail about how the process of breastfeeding occurred. After all, breastfeeding itself is a very important primary relationship in which a newborn becomes acquainted with the very first and, at the initial stage of his life, the most important external object of his life. psychological life. I am talking about an external object - after all, before his appearance “into this world,” the child was in the womb of his mother and his “needs” were “satisfied” at the biological and physiological level. And as a rule, potential problems arise both when the breastfeeding process is insufficient in time and excessively long over months.
I must immediately clarify that all situations are certainly different, and it is always necessary to consider and take into account various factors. And in each case, it can be logical and justified to both reduce the duration of breastfeeding and increase it.
From the point of view of many approaches, normally breastfeeding should be gradually phased out by the time the child can gradually learn to eat other foods, that is, after about a year, until this time breastfeeding plays a very significant role in the formation of the bond in the mother-mother dyad (pair). child. Although we must not forget that mother’s milk is not the only equivalent of “love” that a loving parent can offer their child.
In developmental psychology there is such a concept as “sensitive periods” (of time, development).
For example, speech - if at a certain age a child listens to human speech and tries to speak himself - this activates certain areas of the brain, leading to the growth and development of specific “fields” (areas). If such stimulation does not occur, “the development of the neurometabolic substrate of the psyche” does not occur - that is, “the areas of the brain do not grow and develop properly.”
In particular, it is for this reason - “missed sensitive periods” - that Mowgli children practically cannot master human speech; at best, they can “mechanically copy”, and such “speech” is closer to the “speech” of, for example, a parrot than to human speech - after all, with the help of “words” (“verbal concepts”, “symbolic designations”), a person not only “speaks”, but also “structures his own psyche” - thinks, reasons, “dreams and invents fantasies.”
What is deprived of a child who, up to 2 years of age, believes that “a breast full of milk will always appear at his first request”, how much he will adequately contact reality (after all, in a psychological norm, the process of separation-individuation should begin at 6-8 months and by the age of 2 it’s already over) - with such a “special way of raising a child” - it’s hard to say.
Mother's support and love are VERY important for a child, and of course, in no case should you use “sadistic methods of training” (for example, smearing mustard on your chest), but nevertheless, gradually the child must be “led” to the fact that he will not have life for the rest of his life. the opportunity “always in case of anxiety, problems, worries, to run to my mother’s breast and kiss it a couple of times to calm down.” After all, speaking from a psychological point of view, it is unknown how the brain zones of such a child will be formed and how this will affect his psyche and his abilities to establish and maintain healthy relationships with other people.
By the way, it is also important to understand the psychological concept of a “good enough mother.” After all, a mother who takes too long to satisfy not the “needs”, but rather the “wishes” of the child, from a “good enough mother” turns into a “too good” mother; and the very benefit of any “redundancy” is always in question. Although, of course, this is a question of boundaries, where is “enough” and where is “excessive”.
Often, a person’s internal conflicts are influenced by his own development, childhood, and the upbringing he received in his parents’ family. And if for some reason it turned out that a person himself did not separate from his mother in his own childhood, for example because own mother once “unconsciously used” her child to satisfy her again unconscious needs for “closeness”), then in a completely natural way such a parent will “invest” in her own children the idea that “the most important happiness in life is when mom is around."
There is one very psychologically plausible hypothesis - “what may be associated with the emergence of an active movement of “mothers proving the benefits and necessity of long-term breastfeeding” in the developed countries of Western Europe and America. The fact is that in “developed capitalist countries”, as a rule, the postpartum period of a mother and child being at home by the employer and/or the state was and is paid in a minimal amount. And “women’s emancipation”, the desire of women to actively participate in the social, economic and production spheres of society pushed women to an early transition to artificial feeding. And thus a whole generation of women born in the 50-60-70s of the last century grew up, who, due to the above reasons, were weaned by their mothers from breastfeeding for quite a long time. early age. And further - partly it was the feeling of guilt of the “parents” of this “underfed generation”, driven by a sense of guilt, they began to convince their daughters to “feed their grandchildren as long as possible”, partly it was the women themselves, living with such psychological trauma of their own “underfed”, who began to try not just to compensate, but to “hyper(over)compensate” for this in the process of caring for their own babies. And a fundamentally good idea - the idea that you can’t just stop breastfeeding too early and/or too abruptly, has turned into the “idea” that “you need to give the child the opportunity to use the mother’s breast without any boundaries, even if he will tell you when he gets tired of milk.”
There have been many ideas for research that could support the need and importance of breastfeeding. Well, if people want to prove something, they will, of course, find maximum confirmation and evidence, and their own feelings will lead to a complete denial of any reasonable criticism. Entire associations have emerged promoting breastfeeding. This is, of course, a good thing - but fanaticism is at least senseless, and sometimes dangerous in many areas of life.
Also, the international community increasingly turned to the problems of developing countries, where infant mortality is usually extremely high, and where sometimes breast milk mother's food is the only adequate food for infants and toddlers.
As a result, in 2003, the World Health Organization and UNICEF published a joint Global Strategy for Infant and Young Child Feeding
All other subsequent WHO documents are essentially just a rewrite of this document with one or another variation. But the fact is that this strategy is focused mainly on developing countries, which lag even behind Russia in their socio-economic indicators and development. This is stated almost from the first lines:
From the outset, the goal was to formulate an evidence-based approach to alleviating the tragic burden on the world's children - the 50 to 70 percent of childhood diarrheal diseases, measles, malaria and lower respiratory tract infections that are attributable in some way to malnutrition, and contribute to the sustainable reduction of poverty and deprivation.
So the discussion in WHO documents, which adherents of long-term breastfeeding often like to refer to, is primarily about nutrition, which provides at least some part of the protection against childhood infections. That is, “yes, for the starving children of poor African countries” - this concept is indeed very relevant.
All babies should be exclusively breastfed from birth until approximately 6 months of age, but at least for the first 4 months of life.
It is preferable to continue breastfeeding beyond the first year of life, and in populations with a high prevalence of infections, the child may benefit from continued breastfeeding throughout the second year of life and even beyond.
That is, “for some reason,” many women who advocate for the longest possible duration of breastfeeding forget both about the lower limit and the fact that continued breastfeeding after the first year of life is somehow justified only in “population groups with a high prevalence of infections,” Still, I would not classify Russia as one of them.
Therefore, as some summary can be said the following words. Breastfeeding is necessary and wonderful. For an infant, breast milk - its biological species, the composition of which has stabilized in the process of evolution - is useful, and the process itself is normally pleasant for mother and child, it really helps to establish a stable psychological connection in the mother-child dyad. And this normal psychological connection has a beneficial effect on almost all subsequent stages of the child’s development. Accordingly, in the same way, this normally has a positive effect on the establishment of normal relationships in the overall family system/structure, which changes with the advent of the baby.
But if this life does not turn into a fanatical “struggle for breastfeeding at any cost” with a maximum period of breastfeeding, which is sometimes measured in years, this is probably still somehow beyond the scope of at least the “average statistical norm” . And it is very important to understand that even the absence of milk is in no way a reason to fill a woman, a mother, with a huge bunch of complexes and stick to the child a “label” of “improperly fed” and therefore “somehow inferior.” After all, this is not some kind of “tragedy” but is only one of the variants of the norm.
In this article, I probably focused somewhat less on the positive aspects of breastfeeding and the importance of forming a positive connection in the mother-child dyad; I hope that many, even “most” readers understand this perfectly well.
As a summary - I repeat again - “up to a year - yes, it is very desirable, and after a year, if possible, gradually phase it out.” Moreover, the initiative must come precisely from the mother - after all, someone “one of the two” in this very dyad must take on normal “adult”, “conscious” responsibility.
Pyotr Yurievich Lizyaev
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The benefits of breastfeeding
So, you have been breastfeeding your baby for a long time and with pleasure, but over time, the question comes to your mind more and more often: how and when to wean your baby? When a child is between one and two years of age, our society begins to push the mother to break the close bond with the baby. This is due to the attitudes of the previous generation, in whose life there was no real opportunity to breastfeed a child for a long time. If a mother has come under the influence of ideas about long-term feeding, then she will often be forced to defend herself from the attacks of others and rely on the experience of people with similar worldviews.
In my opinion, weaning a child from breastfeeding at one year or earlier is quite difficult for the child, because the connection with the mother at this age and breastfeeding as a reinforcement of this connection is still very important for the child and mother.
Every parent wants their child to be healthy, confident and independent. Mother's milk and the feeding process gives the child health and self-confidence. Because milk is saturated with useful microelements, and the feeding process relieves the child’s anxiety, fear of abandonment and provides a feeling of closeness and contact with the mother, on whom the child’s entire existence depends. And I must say that without these two components (health and self-confidence) it is difficult to become independent in this world.
When we talk about the end of breastfeeding, we mean that the period has come when the child must become more independent in this life and break away from the close connection that breastfeeding provides. However, it is breastfeeding that provides the foundation on which a child can become independent.
When to stop breastfeeding?
Each dyad of mother and baby solves this issue in its own way, and it is important to note that the solution chosen by the couple itself is very valuable. Something begins to happen between mother and baby that either results in the baby refusing the breast or the mother deciding that she no longer wants to breastfeed. In my opinion, it is this decision made as a couple, and not social attitudes, that makes the completion process less traumatic for the child and more natural for the mother.
I understand that it is important for the reader to learn from a specialist information about clear guidelines (for example, “We don’t feed after 1 year and 6 months” or “We definitely don’t feed after two years”). However, my experience of completing feeding and communicating with other parents as a specialist shows that a clear guideline only interferes with the parent, causing self-dissatisfaction and a feeling of guilt. So the question is “when?” ask yourself and listen to the answer inside - when you yourself, as a mother, want to end such a close relationship with your child.
The only one important point, which can interfere with the natural refusal of feeding, is the absence of a close man in a woman’s life and an intimate relationship with him. In this case, each stage of the child’s growing up, and therefore separation from her, may be unconsciously inhibited by the mother. If your child is almost three, and you don’t want to stop breastfeeding, ask yourself the question: what do you get from this process?
How to stop breastfeeding?
There are two aspects here: the physiological state of the woman herself, associated with the accumulation of milk in the mammary glands, and the construction of a new interaction with the child, excluding breastfeeding.
Regarding physiology, it is important for the mother to consult a gynecologist or lactation consultant. It is important to remember that you can get relief by expressing milk, and that milk production stops after about a week. However, if you experience severe discomfort, be sure to consult a doctor.
As a rule, by the age of one and a half years, the child already receives a complete diet that is not related to mother’s milk; in this case, breastfeeding occurs either when going to bed, or as supplementary feeding after meals, or as a sedative. Your task is to restructure your communication with your child and offer him a different way of contact in these situations. For example, when going to bed, you can sing a simple lullaby, offer a sweet drink after eating, and calm the child down with hugs and kisses. This way you do not deprive the child of contact with you and make this transition the least painful for the baby.
Well, the most important point: you need to explain to your child the reason why you are no longer breastfeeding him. This reason should be significant for you and understandable for the child. For example, you can say that “the boob hurts” (and this would not be far from the truth), and therefore you can no longer give it to the child.
It is calmer and clearer for the child if you, having once made a decision, stand firmly on it and, together with the child, experience the grief of loss, without returning back to feeding. That is, having made a decision, you firmly adhere to it throughout the entire time. It must be said that after two or three days the child and your relationship with him are rebuilt, and the baby no longer remembers the breast.
Good luck to you on this difficult but important path.
Anna Smirnova, psychologist
The time in the history of parenthood is coming to an end when long-term breastfeeding (for example, up to at least 1.5 years) caused surprise and even disapproval from others, and an increasing number of people give in to the pressure of the phrase “recommended by the World Health Organization” and accept what which only yesterday seemed at least strange. And an increasing number of parents are lengthening the period of breastfeeding and even becoming committed to self-weaning of the child. And now that the decision has been made and you can sigh “ugh!” Well, that’s it, let’s feed!”, the time has come to take a closer look at this very GW and understand its subtleties and psychological aspects. Because prolonged breastfeeding, as has already been proven, is good for both mother and baby, but comfortable and harmonious breastfeeding, bringing mutual pleasure, is a bar that many of today's pioneer mothers have yet to reach.
Mother and child initially exist in a kind of symbiosis, and although the baby has already physically separated from the mother, the emotional and psychological separation is still only in its infancy and will continue until adolescence. In the meantime, it is not for nothing that mothers often do not separate themselves from the child even in speech, saying “we”: “we ate”, “we took a walk”.
Infants are extremely sensitive to their mother’s states and her emotional state. They still continue to “live her life” and feed on her “juices,” although not through the umbilical cord, but from the chest.
There is also an opinion that babies are sensitive until a certain time, and not only to the mother herself, but to people in general. Since ancient times, it was not recommended to show a newborn to strangers within a month after birth; it was believed that he could be jinxed. The evil eye acts especially strongly on impressionable and sensitive natures (a child is 10 times more impressionable than any adult). And mothers themselves, purely intuitively, strive to be alone at first, avoid traveling with their babies in public transport. And the famous founder of rebirthing (one of the methods of psychotherapy) L. Orr says that children have extrasensory sensitivity and generally does not recommend showing the child even to relatives for as long as possible...
However, any mother who has at least a slight tendency towards introspection will confirm that children very subtly sense changes in her emotional state and instantly react by changing theirs.
Breastfeeding is not only a process of satiation, it is a sacrament, and paintings of nursing mothers by famous artists speak about this without further ado... When a mother feeds her child, she herself becomes for a while a Madonna - loving and accepting her child without any conditions, absolutely and fully.
None of the mothers will deny that breastfeeding is communication between mother and baby... Folk wisdom(and speaking in psychological language, the collective unconscious) says: “absorb with mother’s milk.” More and more modern authors, who closely study the intricacies of interaction between mother and baby, believe that during breastfeeding the child receives not only useful material for your body, but also important information, necessary for his soul: the emotional state of his mother, and even her experience of the entire universe, is transmitted to him. For the best contact with the child, it is advised to retire for this sacrament and focus on the child and your feelings. And some Orthodox priests encourage mothers to pray before each feeding.
In this regard, it is interesting to note one recent discovery made by the Japanese scientist Masaro Emoto. In general, it has long been known that water is a substance capable of storing and transmitting information, and the latest discoveries of this scientist, which are becoming increasingly famous, show this shockingly clearly. Here's how one online publication talks about his research:
“Masaro Emoto examined droplets of different waters under a powerful microscope and recorded the results photographically. He studied how various sounds and even words affect the structure of water. The laboratory played Beethoven's music, folk music, and hard rock. Then the water was frozen, and it was discovered that Beethoven's music and folk songs led to the formation of geometrically correct, beautiful snowflakes, and heavy rock - to a disorderly accumulation of ice needles.
The “linguistic” experiments were generally on the verge of fantasy! A paper with printed words was glued to a container of water: “love”, “mother”, “God”, “I will kill you”. It turned out that even printed information is perceived by water! The words “mother” and “love” were reflected in the beauty and regularity of the snowflakes, and their shape was identical. The word “God” was accompanied by the formation of snowflakes with… a human face in the center. The phrase “I will kill you” led to the formation of ugly snowflakes, as if they had exploded from the inside.”
A person is 80% water, and how much is mother's milk? Milk “hears” all the mother’s thoughts and perceives her feelings and, of course, passes it on to the child. Apparently, milk is a very powerful carrier of information about the mother’s condition; it is not surprising that babies are so eager for it, especially if they are worried or scared about something. After all, a mother is always a reminder of that serene state when the baby was still one with her.
It is very possible that for many difficult moments of breastfeeding, the legs grow out of this situation: breast refusal, which occurs in babies in the first months of life, breast biting, which becomes a real problem for some mothers when the child begins to have teeth.
Why does he bite? Maybe because mom herself is angry at someone or something at that moment. I don’t think that the child himself is angry with his mother, or even more so, taking revenge on her; most likely, he simply, like a sensitive radar, glorifies the mother’s mood and, apparently, enters a similar state, and squeezing his jaws involuntarily occurs when experiencing anger, sort of like clenching his fists...
What happens, the baby is aware of everything that happens to the mother? But mom has so many worries and worries, and for good reason. And you really want to protect your child from everything bad - that’s why you try! But what a trap you fall into - the trap of your own efforts!
How to use this information so that it is beneficial and serves the parent, and does not become a reason for another headache? After all, mothers are a people fairly loaded with worries, and feeding moments for many are one of the few opportunities to briefly escape from worries, relax, or think about something of their own, but it turns out that even here you have to work hard - and it won’t take long to overwork! I want to warn you against such an attitude. Information is pouring in from all sides about what an ideal mother should be, but how can you not give your child the best! And so the parent has to strain himself... but is this good for the child, and does the family benefit? In fact, what a child really needs is happy mom, and not ideal and therefore mothers most of all really need to take care of themselves and give themselves more love, and not at all strain even more in order to be more best mom. Let me give you some advice on how to deal with this information that I offer you. Do not try to force yourself to control your thoughts and feelings while breastfeeding, do not force yourself when you feel that you cannot be in a blissful state of mind - violence against yourself will only worsen the situation. At such a moment, let everything go as it goes, and do not blame yourself for weakness. When you're in the mood, oh! This is where you can practice. At this favorable moment, think about the fact that your baby is very close to you, maybe even closer than you thought, think about all the good things that you would like to pass on to him. About that hidden thing that lies in the depths of your soul and is prepared especially for your dear child. About what you really truly want and what gives you strength in difficult moments on your parenting journey. Let this beautiful image appear before you and just stay, bask in its rays. Think about the fact that your baby is now bathing in these rays with you, and at this very moment you are passing on to him everything you dream about. Imagine how the warmth of your soul flows along with your milk. Now your child is at your very heart and maybe it is no coincidence that it is during breastfeeding that he is closest to his mother’s heart, so let milk flow to him from the breast, and love from the heart. Stay with this image for as long as you want, as long as it nourishes you. And repeat this exercise every time the desire arises.
Let this information help you become more confident and happy parent, and do not focus on the fact that it is not always possible to be in good mood while breastfeeding, or better yet, be glad that now you know something else that will help you take care of your treasure.
It seems that in modern society there is a clear tendency to turn breastfeeding into something extremely useful and absolutely necessary for full physical and emotional development child. In part, this attitude is understandable and can be explained by the actual benefits of breastfeeding, but no considerations of usefulness can explain some of the excitement around this natural process and attempts to make a kind of cult out of it. Obviously, in addition to rational ones, emotional factors intervene, the main theme of which is a pronounced sentimental attitude towards the mother who is breastfeeding.
Promotion of breastfeeding always has back side- any action ultimately leads to reaction.
There is no doubt that a significant number of people in modern world grew up safely without breastfeeding. This means that the baby has other opportunities to achieve physical and emotional closeness with the mother.
However, let us make a reservation from the very beginning that we have to regret every case when a mother could not breastfeed her child, simply because the mother and child are losing something by not going through this experience.
What do pediatricians say about breastfeeding, do they give it preference over other methods? Some pediatricians believe that successful formula feeding is more beneficial when it comes to anatomy and physiology, which is what they mainly focus on. One should not think that the topic is settled when the pediatrician has put an end to it, especially if the doctor, apparently, forgets that the baby is not only flesh and blood. Psychologists have long understood that a person’s mental health from the very first days is laid down by his mother, who provides what they call “facilitating, helping environment", in which the process natural development the child occurs in accordance with hereditary innate potential. The mother, sometimes without thinking or knowing, lays the foundations of a mentally healthy personality. Such a start in life could be called a good start.
Breastfeeding, of course, is an integral part of the problem of a successful start.
Those who created the theory of human emotional development are, to some extent, also responsible for some overestimation of the importance of the breast for the baby’s psyche. No, they were not mistaken, but time has passed and now “good breasts” is a slang psychoanalytic word that means completely satisfactory maternal care and parental attention in general. Psychologists say that the ability to nurse, hold and handle a child is a more important indicator that a mother is successfully coping with her task than the fact of actually breastfeeding. Psychologists are well aware that many children who seem to have had a satisfactory breastfeeding experience show clear defects in their development and ability to communicate with people and use objects - defects that are due to poor psycho-emotional support.
Thus, we want to make it clear that the word “breast” and the idea of breastfeeding is only part of what is included in the concept of being a mother to a child.
It becomes clear how harmful it can be to force mothers to breastfeed. Any child psychologist I saw children who had a very bad time when the mother wanted and tried to breastfeed them, but could not do this, since this process is not amenable to conscious control. The mother suffers and the child suffers. With transition to artificial feeding sometimes there is great relief and things get better, in the sense that the child is satisfied by getting the right amount of the right food. Much pain can be avoided without turning the idea of breastfeeding into a dogma. It is not correct to say that a woman should breastfeed her child; rather, we would consider it more appropriate if a woman wanted to breastfeed her child and if she came to this desire naturally.
It is important that doctors understand that they are needed, very necessary, if things go wrong on the physiological side, but they are not specialists when it comes to physical and emotional intimacy, which is vital for both mother and baby.
Mother and child need suitable conditions that allow the mother to believe in herself, in her maternal competence. The mother herself needs support. In this sense, it seems to me that the practice of having the child’s father present at the birth is very valuable. His presence gives additional significance to the very first moments of a baby’s life. The same thing applies to breastfeeding. The mother cannot breastfeed through conscious effort: she must wait for her own body to react. On the other hand, it is possible that the reaction is so intense that the mother is unable to wait for the baby, and she needs help to do something with her breasts overflowing with milk.
There are mothers who experience very great difficulties due to their internal conflict, which may be related to their own traumatic childhood experiences. Sometimes such mothers can be helped. A psychologist or doctor must understand that if a mother is unable to breastfeed, it would be a mistake to insist on continuing attempts that are unlikely to succeed, but harm from them is very likely. Therefore, it is very harmful when those responsible for helping a mother have preconceived ideas about what she should do in relation to breastfeeding. Often a mother is forced to switch to a different method of feeding early, but after giving birth to a second or third child, she can successfully cope with Onam and then be happy that breastfeeding comes to her without any effort - naturally. However, if a mother is unable to breastfeed, she still has many other ways to connect closely, physically and emotionally, with her baby.
Thus, I approach the value of breastfeeding with the idea that breastfeeding is not absolutely necessary, especially for mothers who have personal difficulties with it. Many important features Breastfeeding is also present when bottle feeding. For example, a child and mother look into each other's eyes. This is a significant aspect of early experience that does not involve the use of a real breast. However, it can be assumed that the fullness of taste and smell and the entirety of the sensations of breastfeeding remain unknown small child, taking a rubber pacifier.
Along with the child’s experiences, which are richer when breastfeeding rather than bottle-feeding, let us remember what the mother herself feels during feeding. This is, of course, a separate topic. Here I will note only the feeling of achievement that a mother can experience when her own physiology, which at first led her to some confusion, suddenly makes sense, and she is already able to cope with her fears, having figured out that she has something called “milk”. , which she is able to give while enjoying contact with the child.
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